Joe Bidet By userrrrr - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 455 You deserved it 3 839 Share Tweet Share
Today, I asked my classmate if she was ready for the final tomorrow and she said it was yesterday. I'm not a bad student - I have 90+ average in the class - but the final was 50% of my grade. FML I agree, your life sucks 4 564 You deserved it 1 905
Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend if she thinks I have a big package. She replied that she didn't want to upset me and get into another fight. FML I agree, your life sucks 28 674 You deserved it 41 029
Today, I was so bored I began practicing an irish jig. For two hours. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 894 You deserved it 26 674
Today, I got a one-inch fish bone stuck in my throat. I went to the doctor, who claimed he couldn't see the long white thing embedded next to my tonsil. He charged me $70, and told me to eat some bread. I had to pull it out myself with a pair of tweezers. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 696 You deserved it 2 360
Today, my soon-to-be-ex-husband decided to bring our four kids over to tell them we were splitting up, and to make them choose who they want to live with, because, "Mommy’s been a nagging bitch." He left out that the "nagging bitch" caught him having an affair the night before. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 301 You deserved it 198
Today, I was reciting lines for a play that I'm in. It was going great, until I realized that I was actually reciting my scripted sales pitch from my telemarketing job. FML I agree, your life sucks 26 297 You deserved it 7 964
There's a keeper!
Are you sure she wasn't joking... i mean... come on... who does that?