Joe Bidet By userrrrr - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 453 You deserved it 3 839 Share Tweet Share
Today, after months of searching and several emotional breakdowns, I finally found a new job. My wife's words of encouragement? "Try not to fuck this one up." FML I agree, your life sucks 33 476 You deserved it 9 547
Today, I have accidentally encountered my parents having "sexy time" four times in the past week. I'm an adult. My parents are in their fifties. Their bedroom door doesn't fully shut, so I always get an unpleasant glimpse when I walk past, occasionally punctuated by my mom's pleasured moaning. Kill me now. FML I agree, your life sucks 977 You deserved it 644
Today, I was at a wedding and leaned over to whisper to my friend, “Wow, this is the cheapest-looking cake I’ve ever seen.” The bride was right behind me holding the cake knife. She heard every word. Luckily, she didn't stab me. FML I agree, your life sucks 70 You deserved it 821
Today, my husband refused to let our 7-week-old daughter have a pacifier, because he doesn't want her growing up to be a "whore." FML I agree, your life sucks 49 857 You deserved it 4 884
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to throw me against the wall and kiss me like they do in the movies. Being all aggressive and smooth, he grabs my shirt and pushes me. He pushed a little too hard and my head was thrown back into the wall. I was knocked out for ten minutes. FML I agree, your life sucks 73 210 You deserved it 6 310
Today, for our 8th wedding anniversary I gave my husband several well-thought-out gifts. He gave me divorce papers. FML I agree, your life sucks 4 989 You deserved it 396
There's a keeper!
Are you sure she wasn't joking... i mean... come on... who does that?