Joe Bidet By userrrrr - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 455 You deserved it 3 839 Share Tweet Share
Today, I had such a violent coughing fit that my stomach emptied itself all over the floor while at my sales job. FML I agree, your life sucks 32 227 You deserved it 3 230
Today, I returned a rental car and almost got charged extra for the "funky and rotten" smell in the car. I blamed it on a sausage roll, not having the heart to tell the woman it was my fart from a minute before. FML I agree, your life sucks 29 330 You deserved it 7 784
Today, I was at Sea World and was about to take a picture of the big walrus. I noticed my phone was still set to use the front camera, and I muttered "Oops, selfie mode." A guy next to me turned, looked at me, and said "Not like there's a difference for you." FML I agree, your life sucks 56 288 You deserved it 9 325
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house, intending to break up with him. Instead, I was greeted by his whole family throwing me a surprise party. I had to sit and listen to his whole family talk about what a great couple we are and how we're going to last forever. FML I agree, your life sucks 59 205 You deserved it 9 480
Today, I went to the grocery store and saw my ex with her new partner. I tried to hide from them, but ended up getting locked in the store after closing time. I had to call security to let me out. FML I agree, your life sucks 252 You deserved it 950
Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML I agree, your life sucks 28 038 You deserved it 1 815
There's a keeper!
Are you sure she wasn't joking... i mean... come on... who does that?