FML's guide to a stress-free St Patrick's Day By Louis - 17/03/2017 18:15 - France - Paris Savour the flavor of the day, but be careful out there! agreeclassic 722 vote type 1 196 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was working alone in the office with my brother. He's run out of work to do, so has been singing Disney songs loudly and badly, throwing stationery at me, and just now snuck up on me from behind and wrapped duct tape round my face. It's just us in the office next week. FML agreeclassic 26 111 vote type 1 2 865
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML agreeclassic 2 470 vote type 1 787
Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML agreeclassic 45 920 vote type 1 7 057
Today, I made a nice meal for myself and sat down to eat. Suddenly, my dad burst into my room saying, “We have to go.” This isn’t the first time it’s happened, nor was it an emergency. My family just doesn’t tell me when we have plans. FML agreeclassic 1 801 vote type 1 178
Today, I bought a GPS collar for my adventurous cat. After setting it up and being very curious about what he gets up to when I'm not home, I opened the app and saw his current location marked as “Inside your house.” All day. Groundbreaking. FML agreeclassic 99 vote type 1 403
Today, my boyfriend found out it makes a funny fart sound when he blows hard into my mouth in the middle of making out. I can't get him to stop doing it every time we kiss. FML agreeclassic 55 160 vote type 1 5 981