Love, Marriage and Relatable: Better Al than Ted - FML

Better Al than Ted

By Anonymous - 07/11/2021 23:00

Today, the older I get, the more I realise I married a clone of Al Bundy, right down to the sticking of his hand down his pants, the refusal to have sex with me except under protest, and the toilet he built in the garage only he is allowed to use. FML

agreeclassic 1 043

vote type 1 257

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

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A heartwarming family story

By Anonymous - 15/02/2023 22:00

Today, I realized that over 20 years ago I married a man who could never mature, after we had a marital argument and he couldn't just have an one side, but rather decided to involve our 11 year-old old son, allowing him to repeat his words toward me, like "bitch", "whore", and "cunt." FML

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Letting yourself go

By Anonymous - 13/06/2022 12:00

Today, my husband is becoming more uncivilised the older he gets, as I had to remind him to put trousers on while we have guests in the house, and over dinner he was picking his belly button at the table. FML

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It's not a phase!

By Anonymous - 11/06/2021 07:59

Today, despite 18 years of marriage and two kids together, my father-in-law still insists my wife will one day grow up, realise I was the result of some rebellious phase she’s going through, divorce me and marry a decent boy from her hometown. FML

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Fate, up against your will

By Gerry - 03/01/2021 17:03

Today, according to my wife of 30 years, I'm finally old enough that I look, smell, sound and act like my father. FML

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Livin' la vida loca!

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Today, I realized my life is very similar to my dad’s, except I’m only 55 and he’s almost 80. FML

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This is fine

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A right bunch of berks

By Anonymous - 25/09/2022 02:30 - United Kingdom

Today, I met my boyfriend's family. He calls his parents things like “geriatric hag” and “old clown”. I was about to yell at him, but they started calling him “nancy boy” and “nerd”. Apparently they love each other, but only communicate through abuse. I can’t believe I may soon marry into this mess. FML

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Like father like son

By Anonymous - 14/09/2022 00:30

Today, my ex has successfully turned our son into a copy of himself, a crooked lawyer with alcoholism, a wife who hates him, a mistress he can’t afford, and a pending jail sentence for tax evasion. They’re practically twins. FML

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By nothisfault - 05/12/2008 04:40 - France

Today, and as for the rest of my life, I will always have a husband whose breath stinks. FML

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For fans of '90S UK TV

By Anonymous - 01/02/2022 17:00

Today, and since his retirement, my husband's enthusiasm for life has declined, his love of beer and crisps has skyrocketed, and his interest in personal hygiene has plummeted. Add to that his wearing of old, worn clothes with holes in he almost completely looks like Onslow from 'Keeping Up Appearances.' FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

RichardPencil 30

Monday 8 November 2021 0:28

Surely, you have to like the discount on shoes from his store?

tipsyone 22

Monday 8 November 2021 0:49

If he has great funny insulting comebacks to your lesbian neighbor it’s all good

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 8 November 2021 0:28

Surely, you have to like the discount on shoes from his store?

tipsyone 22

Monday 8 November 2021 0:49

If he has great funny insulting comebacks to your lesbian neighbor it’s all good

Hangryko 31

Monday 8 November 2021 17:58

It's funny to laugh at in a sitcom, not so funny in real life. Time to leave him.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I came home and told my mom that I got the lead in the school musical, which I was very happy about. She pulled me into a hug then said, "But you know you can't really sing, right?" FML

agreeclassic 28 950

vote type 1 3 066

Today, a woman had a wardrobe malfunction right in front of me. As if that's not awkward enough, that woman was my own mother. FML

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vote type 1 157

Today, I had to take a taxi to work, because I was pressed for time, and didn't have a ride there. When I got to work, I paid the cab driver, and realized I had spent more money on the cab than I was going to make at work. FML

agreeclassic 30 628

vote type 1 4 753

Today, I'm suffering with an acute and weird form of misophonia. I get irrationally triggered and angry whenever I hear someone say words and phrases like, "at a level that nobody's ever seen before", "radical left", "like you wouldn't believe", "nobody’s ever seen anything like it", and "drill baby drill." I need professional help. FML

agreeclassic 241

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Today, I bought tickets to Walt Disney World for myself and my 6 year-old. She just announced she's afraid to ride an escalator, to the point of tears. FML

agreeclassic 828

vote type 1 209

Today, I was feeling down so I thought I'd order a burger to cheer myself up. The website I ordered from featured Instagram pics of their customers. My ex and the guy she cheated on me with were front and center. FML

agreeclassic 4 275

vote type 1 319