Artistic licence

By Anonymous - 16/04/2020 14:00

Today, after spending at least 4 hours drawing a realistic shadow of a vampire for a picture contest, I finally remembered that vampires aren't supposed to produce shadows. FML

agreeclassic 1 259

vote type 1 762

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By anaph0re - 01/02/2009 15:52 - France

Today, it was good fun getting this nice vampire make-up at my drama lesson. It would have been better if I hadn't forgotten my demake-up. Even better if I could have avoided those crazy glances in the bus home. FML

agreeclassic 8 719

vote type 1 21 540

By ick - 31/07/2010 01:44 - United States

Today, I was repainting the walls in my room. While painting, I noticed a dark spot on the wall that wouldn't seem to go away no matter how much paint I put on it. A bucket of paint and hours later, I realized that "dark spot" was a shadow. FML

agreeclassic 9 628

vote type 1 60 134

By kebaby - 19/06/2010 23:19 - United States

Today, I spent a long time steam-cleaning a mystery stain on my living room carpet. I turned the light on to get a better look at it, and realized that it was a shadow. FML

agreeclassic 11 944

vote type 1 48 205

By Anonymous - 27/10/2009 04:22 - United States

Today, while I was showering, a dark object in the shower kept startling me. After about the fourth time jumping, I realized it was my shadow that was scaring me. I am actually literally afraid of my own shadow. FML

agreeclassic 10 993

vote type 1 30 128

Pencil in the ass time

By Anonymous - 13/03/2020 01:13

Today, I was in art class in which we were drawing mythical creatures. I spent the entire hour and a half drawing a Minotaur, which turned out extremely well. It turned out so well that the teacher thought I had traced it, and told me to start over right before the bell rang. FML

agreeclassic 1 821

vote type 1 131

By buhknee - 25/11/2009 00:08 - United States

Today, I realized that our generation will be remembered as the kids who liked sparkly vampires. FML

agreeclassic 76 543

vote type 1 13 516

Nervous wreck

By jumpy - 14/09/2023 04:00

Today, I was literally startled by my own shadow. I hate having anxiety. FML

agreeclassic 541

vote type 1 163

By Nana - 22/10/2012 15:39 - Sweden - Skellefte

Today, I showed my friends the picture I drew picturing the four of us in a 'zombie apocalypse' setting. Turns out they never saw me as their friend, and I'm creeping them out. FML

agreeclassic 29 773

vote type 1 8 526

Read the TOS

By Lameartist - 12/02/2012 10:36

Today, I had just finished an elaborate charcoal drawing as part of a college application that took a good week. When I read over the requirements, I found out it needed to be done in graphite pencil. FML

agreeclassic 16 592

vote type 1 37 937

By can't wait to go home - 10/06/2016 19:18 - Trinidad and Tobago - Port-of-spain

Today, I lost an art contest to some talentless arsepipe whose piece was literally just a broken heart crudely drawn in her own blood. FML

agreeclassic 13 304

vote type 1 1 992

Dale Gulley 8

Thursday 16 April 2020 14:18

Thought that was reflections in a mirror. But this is myth so go crazy. Who can argue against your vamp casting a shadow

BurnInDemonFire 35

Thursday 16 April 2020 16:11

They aren't supposed to sparkle in sunlight, either, but here we are. *walks off to 'Without Me' by Eminem*

Comments

Ariane Bolt 6

Tuesday 28 April 2020 20:56

Just claim that the vampire is being hunted by the Vashta Nerada.

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Today, my husband threw an anger fit and left home after a fight. I only said that maybe he's not that interested in sex after marriage. Why? In the 5 years of our marriage, he has initiated sex exactly 0 times, while during courtship it was numerous times during the day. FML

agreeclassic 1 282

vote type 1 172

Today, my junkie son came to the house showered, in clean clothes, with sobriety chips from NA, full of apologies, and we had a good cry about his recovery. I went to the kitchen for tissues, for less than a minute, but when I got back he’d stolen my purse, television, and spare change jar with about £75 in it. FML

agreeclassic 1 209

vote type 1 169

Today, my husband wants a divorce. His reason, so he claims, is that he went to see a card reader a few months ago and she told him our relationship would not last. Apparently, our astrological signs or something are not compatible, so he thinks we shouldn't waste our time. We've been married for 8 years. FML

agreeclassic 1 950

vote type 1 192

Today, I got the news that my ex-boyfriend from two years ago died in a car crash. My fiancé found me crying in the living room when he came home from work. When he found out why I was inconsolable, he said, "Make sure you say hi to that abusive turd in hell for me, thanks for everything." He is now staying at a hotel. FML

agreeclassic 865

vote type 1 1 630

Today, after selling things on eBay all week to afford a nice weekend with my husband and kids, my car died. Now we have to spend the money on a battery. FML

agreeclassic 3 682

vote type 1 348

Today, I received a few new fish for my aquarium as presents for my birthday. It just so happened that these fish were carrying diseases that left me with a tank full of dead fish. Happy birthday. FML

agreeclassic 31 806

vote type 1 2 930