After too many family dinners By Lewis - 28/12/2018 00:30 - France - Paris I'm not fat! Just well prepared for winter... I agree, your life sucks 276 You deserved it 133 Share Tweet Share
Today, my husband was arrested because a fox, fleeing from about a billion dogs and rich twats on horses, jumped through our car window, and cowered between my legs. He got out of the car, waded through the dogs, and pulled one of the twats off his horse into a puddle, ruining his red coat. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 741 You deserved it 252
Today, I discovered a cool song called, "I Don't Wanna Die" by a Korean band, VINCIT. Wanting to find out more about it, I googled its title. Instead of relevant results, I got the phone number to a suicide prevention hotline. To make things worse, now all my social media are filled with ads about suicide prevention. FML I agree, your life sucks 451 You deserved it 177
Today, I started my spring break. My college is letting the students stay in the dorms for break, so I figured that staying here would mean getting more sleep than going home. Not so much. The fire alarm has been going off every 20 mins since 7:30am because they're "fixing" it. FML I agree, your life sucks 25 549 You deserved it 3 597
Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of my nose with my fingernail, drawing blood in the process. I had to quickly up an explanation for my scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting for boogers..." FML I agree, your life sucks 7 499 You deserved it 24 702
Today, I worked my boyfriend's shift so he could stay home. I even brought him the free meal I got for helping out. Turns out he wanted to stay home so badly to cheat on me. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 425 You deserved it 3 548
Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML I agree, your life sucks 14 851 You deserved it 56 822
Another chance for you to pick your winner of the week. So, who does it for you? I agree, your life sucks 466 You deserved it 132
Today, the first guy I tried to have sex with at university got his foreskin stuck in his zip and had to go to hospital for stitches. He told all his friends I did it on purpose with my teeth during a blowjob. I now have a reputation, so I guess I'm staying single for the next 3 years. FML I agree, your life sucks 7 187 You deserved it 704