Frustration

Repression

By Anonymous - 14/02/2022 12:00

Spicy

Today, I found out my platonic office wife and I are both in sexless relationships. The week just gets more and more repressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 115

You deserved it 333

Wasted youth

By rob - 13/12/2023 15:00 - United States

Today, I’m 25 years-old. I was unattractive in high school and college. In the last two years I’ve glown up. Also, rent, gas, and food have all gone up in price. I can’t afford dates and I've had to work weekend nights at every job since I was 18. I hate these “rich kids” my age. FML

I agree, your life sucks 487

You deserved it 207

Classic

By Wrong number - 25/02/2022 21:00 - Canada - Vancouver

Today, I got a call and was offered a position with a company that I really wanted to work for. I just had to wait a week to confirm that everything was good to go. Ten seconds after ending the call, they called back and said that they'd called the wrong person. The offer was for someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 241

You deserved it 96

Uninvited

By Boner Jim - 24/07/2025 14:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girl came home and said, "I'm gonna jump in the shower, I'm horny as fuck." Naturally, I assumed that was an invitation, so I lit some candles quickly and hopped on the bed, waiting for her. She got out, looked at me funny and said, "The fuck are you doing? I want to masturbate. Get out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 136

O'Reilly

By still can’t get any - 04/04/2022 06:00

Spicy

Today, I’m convinced my son has some sort of radar. Literally every time my partner and I try to have sex, he wakes up and interrupts us. At first I thought it was a coincidence, but the fact that it’s happened at 12am, 12pm, 6am and 3pm tells me otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 456

You deserved it 242

You'll miss me when I'm gone

By Anonymous - 04/09/2024 20:00 - Germany - Borken

Spicy

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend. I did my best to get him hard, and as always, I succeeded, but he still didn’t bother to look up from his phone. Unfortunately this happens almost every time I try to have sex with him. I guess TikTok is more important. FML

I agree, your life sucks 628

You deserved it 200

Healthy relationship goals

By Anonymous - 29/09/2023 04:00

Spicy

Today, as usual, my wife only wants to have sex to reproduce. As soon as she falls pregnant, the shop is closed. She doesn't care about my sexual needs, saying if I was really that horny, I should go sleep with some else. I'm not that guy and if I do get the guts to do so, I‘m afraid she will hold it against me, and take the kids and our savings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 194

Like a dream

By love and tolerape, apparently - 01/03/2015 19:24 - India - Jamshedpur

Spicy

Today, after a 7-year dry spell, I finally got laid. The downside? It was in my dreams and involved a character from My Little Pony forcing itself on me. Now I hate that fucking stupid show more than ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 196

You deserved it 8 431

Poor performance

By Anonymous - 28/12/2022 03:00

Spicy

Today, I finally had sex with my husband and orgasmed. Three hours apart from each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 123

You deserved it 331

Not feeling it

By Anonymous - 20/06/2021 02:01

Spicy

Today, it’s been over 15 months since I’ve had sex with my fiancé. We’re getting married next month. Now I'm wondering if we’ll have sex at all on our honeymoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 467

You deserved it 385

Dude, were you just in a McDonald's?

By Anonymous - 25/12/2022 15:00

Spicy

Today, it started off as a good day, until my guy friend called me in the middle of me turning my vibrator on. He was crying so I couldn’t finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 851

Let down

By Anonymous - 26/01/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I went on a date with a sweet guy who was 6”11 tall, a size 14 shoe, a 55 inch chest from all his gym muscles, hands like baseball gloves, and gorgeous green eyes… all attached to a 3 inch penis that I could barely feel, and that lasted barely 15 seconds. The foreplay was shit too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 543

Yeet the kid

By Anonymous - 29/06/2021 16:01

Today, my son no longer tries to sneak in and out of the house at inappropriate times. Now, he just brazenly walks out, ignoring me when I ask where he’s going, then walks back in at like 4 in the morning, and again ignores me because he’s still on his phone to someone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 1 074

Rubbing it in

By GET A ROOM - 26/09/2022 04:30

Spicy

Today, I heard the very loud buzzing of a fly nearby, and I felt a tingly sensation on my arm. I thought there was a fly on my arm; I was half-right. There were, in fact, two flies having sex on my arm. That's something I will never unsee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 107

You deserved it 275

Let me speak to a human!

By Yudith - 28/07/2025 00:22 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I ordered a set of chairs on Amazon for my work. The confirmation code they were sending didn't show up on my phone or email. Two hours and countless chats with customer service bots later, when I got to speak with a human, the confirmation codes showed up. I still cannot order the chairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 626

You deserved it 181

Yudith tells us more.

Yudith 25

Sunday 27 July 2025 13:29

Update: after creating a business account only to be able to order the damn chairs and ordering again, the system somehow took my personal credit card to complete the transaction, then cancelled it just because. I still cannot order the chairs. Will try again on Monday.

Gagging for it

By Anonymous - 24/02/2024 21:00 - Greece - Athens

Spicy

Today, I thought I knew what sexual frustration was in my teens, but that was nothing compared to a (due to circumstances, but still) sexless married life, in a shitty economy. I'm so tense, I could tear down a wall with my bare hands right now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 454

You deserved it 171

Damn regulations

By Anonymous - 27/07/2021 06:01

Today, after being years of being told that it's a pipe dream and that I couldn't do it, I finally qualified for my unconventional dream job, competing with almost 100k people, only to find out during the medical exam that as I have epilepsy, I'm unfit for the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 238

You deserved it 110

Communication Breakdown

By not negative just real - 17/07/2022 09:00 - United States

Today, I’m still on bed rest recovering from life-altering surgery. My pain is unreal but the pills make me nauseous or knock me out cold. When I try to express what I’m going through, all anyone tries to do is cheer me up without listening. I just want someone to understand what I’m going through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 194

All I need to do…

By Dreamblocker - 28/06/2021 22:00

Spicy

Today, I was having an intense erotic dream. It was going great until I thought, "I hope this isn't a dream." This caused me to wake up. This isn't the first time I've cockblocked myself in a dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 207

The topic at hand

By Frustrated Student - 30/10/2022 04:00 - United States

Today, I got stuck in a group project with three other people who spent the whole period trying to figure out how old the teacher was. Good news: They came to the conclusion that he must be around 35-40 years old. Bad news: we are gonna have a hard time finishing this project if they don't pull their weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 838

You deserved it 105

Girls just wanna go home

By budadepressed - 18/07/2016 21:22 - United States - Burnsville

Today, due to a scheduling error, I spent an entire day and night in an airport, over 30 hours in total. Just as I arrived at the gate, I was informed that my flight had been delayed for another 2 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 614

You deserved it 1 085

Gagging for it

By Anonymous - 26/06/2011 21:42 - United States

Spicy

Today, I went on a third date with a guy, hoping I'd finally get some action. I got a high five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 112

You deserved it 10 638

By horny and alone - 04/11/2018 03:00

Spicy

Today, I went home with my cute coworker. What started out as a little dirty talk and teasing ended with him admitting he was in a terrible emotional place, then sending me home in an Uber so he could sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 791

You deserved it 426

Get out of the garage

By lq87 - 09/08/2023 01:00 - United States - Lebanon

Spicy

Today, I realized my fiance would rather sit in the garage and get high than spend any time with me. I can't remember the last time we had sex and I don't know what to do at this point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 545

You deserved it 148

Girl, DIY

By Anonymous - 23/06/2023 03:00

Spicy

Today, my wife yelled at me to "just stick it up her ass already." No, not for anal sex, it was a suppository she got from the doctor. This is the closest I’ve been to sex in two years, since she decided we were done having sex and won’t even explain why when I ask. We’re only in our 30s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 231

You deserved it 201

His little lipstick

By poopface82 - 06/07/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I was exhausted after three solid weeks of having my kids. After I got home, my dog decided to get intimate with his stuffed animal toy. I now know what my dog’s dong looks like, and that he’s gotten more action in the last two months than I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

All the single ladies (All the single ladies)

By Lissa - 10/09/2019 20:00

Spicy

Today, I’m a 28 year-old single mom who has never has never experienced an orgasm. This sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 863

You deserved it 617

Just tradwife things

By Fapmaster - 07/01/2023 03:00

Spicy

Today, after a year and a half of sticking to my new wife’s “no-sex-before marriage” rule while we dated, she brushed me off while I tried to consummate the marriage. Apparently, she’s not ready to have kids yet and “semen will get the sheets dirty.” Guess I’ll be jerking it on my honeymoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 898

You deserved it 817

Even more lonely now

By homealone - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, my parents left on a trip. I wanted to invite my girlfriend over for a few days so we could spend them together. Then my grandparents turn up, "just for a few days, until your parents return, so you won't be all alone in this big house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 208

You deserved it 4 017

Cheating with the showerhead

By Anonymous - 12/12/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my wife shouted at me for masturbating in the shower, because, "It’s disgusting." She hasn’t touched me sexually in two years FML

I agree, your life sucks 615

You deserved it 133

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Embarrassing Awkward Work AITA Parenting Kids Love Money Family Miscellaneous Funerals Relatable Social Media Wanker Porn Intimacy NSFW Cute Alcohol Garden Sex Dating Frustration Health Parents Allergies Grandparents Abuse Technology Instagram

The Top

The Top

Today, I finally got the courage to ask my best friend to go on a date with me. She assumed I meant a double date and squealed, "Who's the lucky guy?!" She thought I was her gay best friend for the past year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 924

You deserved it 759

Today, during a blowjob, my girlfriend decided to try something new by squeezing my balls as hard as she could as I came, for a "more intense orgasm". All she gave me was a ruptured testicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 339

You deserved it 2 992

Today, I ate at Subway during my lunch hour. A group of teenage girls sat down at the table next to mine. They all shared good laugh about the "friendless, chubby chick" sitting near them, while attempting to discreetly point at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 547

You deserved it 3 082

Today, I finally got the hearing aids that I've needed for years. My dog quickly learned that if he quietly sneaks up behind me and barks, it'll scare the hell out of me. It's now his favorite game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 103

You deserved it 363

Today, my friends told me that my girlfriend of over a year and a half refers to me on Facebook, Twitter and Snapchat as "the monster I can't get rid of." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 583

You deserved it 214

Today, I came for the first time WAY after the normal age, which is like 11 to 13 (I’m 16) and not only that, but I learned I have to deal with medical conditions, because it was painful when I ejaculated. The first time I even had testicle retraction. I’m just like my goddamn dad with his problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 136