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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Cops

    No escape

    By natty - 16/03/2009 16:02 - United States

    Today, I went to a party and the cops came to bust the party. I jumped out the window of a second story house in order to avoid getting arrested. I broke my leg in three places and got a concussion. The cops let everyone go with a warning. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 46 316
    You deserved it 203 420
    Share  

    Stuck on Amber

    By River - 26/02/2009 16:17 - United States

    Today, a stoplight turned yellow as I was approaching it. I was about to go through but saw a cop, panicked, and slammed on the brakes. I ended up in the middle of the intersection and had to reverse. Soon the light turned green, and I stepped on the gas. My car was still in reverse. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 18 242
    You deserved it 56 195
    Share  

    Creeped out

    By Godfree - 25/02/2009 06:19 - United States

    Today, I was walking to a meeting and saw two girls trying to jump start a car in the rain. Thinking I'd be a gentleman and help them, I offered to assist. The girl whose car is broken down looks at me, looks at her friend, and says, "I think we'd better call the police." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 44 125
    You deserved it 3 261
    Share  
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    Keywords

    Dogs Messy Animals Cute Love ACAB Cops Miscellaneous Thief NSFW Sex Intimacy Fight #FAFO Sexism Kids Parents Swimming pool Disney Money Abuse Health Poopoo peepee Farts Gross Cheating Shopping Weird Vacation Holidays
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, my dad tried to help me overcome my intense fear of horses (due to nearly being killed by one as a child) by taking me to a ranch. Within 30 minutes, a horse bit my face. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 4 022
    You deserved it 480
    Today, my boyfriend pointed out that the water bill is getting kind of high. I suggested that we shower together to save water. He said he'd rather deal with the high water bill. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 32 190
    You deserved it 4 079
    Today, I tried to show my boss a funny photo on my phone. As I handed it over, a notification popped up from my mom that said, “Did you finally meet a nice boy or are you still feral?” FML
    I agree, your life sucks 332
    You deserved it 101
    Today, I work as a cashier, and as always, I asked the customer paying credit to sign the "sheet" of paper. I received a dirty look from one woman who apparently talked to the manager about me, saying I had asked her to sign the "shitty" paper. I have now been warned for "derogatory language." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 31 676
    You deserved it 2 836
    Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML
    I agree, your life sucks 77 842
    You deserved it 19 992
    Today, I was shopping with my baby daughter when an older woman came up to me. She glared and said, "You know, if you kids learned how to keep your legs closed, you wouldn't be a mother at 16." I'm 25. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 44 153
    You deserved it 4 035
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