The Top

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Hero complex

By Anonymous - 27/03/2025 22:00 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I was walking through a Tesco's car park when I saw a shopping trolley slowly rolling towards me. I figured I’d be a hero and stop it before it hit a car. As I grabbed it, I slipped on a patch of ice and crashed straight into the cart, sending right it into the car I was trying to protect, denting the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 388

You deserved it 99

Gimme a break

By Respect the handyman - 01/04/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, after days of my wife nagging me, I started working on the flat pack furniture she ordered. Every twenty minutes, she interrupted me to demand I stop and help her with something trivial and irrelevant. Now I remember why I postpone projects as long as possible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 120

Curb your curb

By Anonymous - 07/04/2025 09:00 - United States - Boulder

Today, on my way out of a coffee shop, I tripped over a curb while holding a full cup of coffee. The coffee flew in slow motion, hitting a stranger right in the face. As I stood there, frozen, I realized the puddle of coffee was now surrounding both of us. All I could do was apologize while trying to avoid a public fistfight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 104

Many such cases

By Anonymous - 10/04/2025 22:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I was in a meeting at work, trying to keep my composure. I quietly shifted in my chair and accidentally let out a fart. It echoed in the conference room, and everyone stared at me in stunned silence. My boss sarcastically said, “Well, that’s just, like, your opinion, man.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 135

You deserved it 207

Nervous introvert of the day

By Anonymous - 18/04/2025 03:00 - Pakistan - Karachi

Today, it was a bad day. I had a crush on a classmate, but he switched schools a month ago. We started to develop a good relationship when it happened, and he came to our party on Friday, we even had a good conversation. But he visited school today, and I ignored him. I should've waved hi, but I didn't because I was busy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61

You deserved it 621

Third wheel

By Anonymous - 19/04/2025 14:00 - United States - New York

Today, I spent a lot of effort making sure my roommate had a good birthday. We've hooked up in the past, and a mutual friend of ours is staying the night. Also someone I've made out with before. We were hanging out and the vibes were good, but when I initiated a cuddle puddle, they declined. Now they are hooking up without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 148

You deserved it 382

Sharing my journey

By Anonymous - 05/07/2025 00:00 - United States - Healdsburg

Today, my partner has been losing weight to get slimmer and took a picture of the scale. He posted it onto his Facebook and tagged me in it. After two hours we got messages from his family to look in the reflection of the glass on the scale and I was nude in the background. Thanks, Hun! FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Trapped

By Anonymous - 05/07/2025 08:00 - United States

Today, it's been a week since my girl told me she's pregnant and I fled town in a panic. I realized how badly I fucked up and called her, begging to come back. When I showed up at her house, her brothers kicked my ass and threw me in the street, promising to wring me dry for child support. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Freakout

By Anonymous - 05/07/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I learned my wife has an extra level of anger. First is sarcasm, then yelling, then the silent treatment, it’s been that way for our whole marriage. Turns out the level above that is hurling a sledgehammer at me. She still won’t tell me what I did to surpass the silent treatment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

One step at a time

By shengming - 06/07/2025 04:00 - China

Today, I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. Although I am very happy in a sense and feel that there is finally an explanation for the past, this issue is not conducive to my adjustment to society. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Gooners rise up

By Meanwhile we barely ever fuck - 05/07/2025 17:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend left his laptop open, signed into a chat program. I learned why he started working out and eating right. Not to look good for me or be healthier. No, he planned his entire diet and exercise plan so he could shoot the biggest loads possible during "goon sessions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

His little lipstick

By poopface82 - 06/07/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I was exhausted after three solid weeks of having my kids. After I got home, my dog decided to get intimate with his stuffed animal toy. I now know what my dog’s dong looks like, and that he’s gotten more action in the last two months than I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Hiding

By Anonymous - 04/07/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I learned just how disgusted I am by my own body, when I was debating whether or not I should wear a baggy hoodie in 92 degree Fahrenheit weather. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I showed my best friend a picture of my new girlfriend. He gave me a high five, followed up with, "Looks like we're Eskimo bros!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 132

Today, I went to McDonald's to get breakfast. I sat my food down at a table and went to get some napkins and a straw. I returned to the table to find that my food was gone, and could hear nothing but "SUCKKAAAA" trailing from the entrance to the restaurant. Some jerk stole my meal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 551

You deserved it 9 811

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents. Later on, his mom pulls me aside and tells me to back off, saying he will never marry someone like me and he should be with a nice girl like his ex. They broke up after he found her in his bed with his roomate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 840

You deserved it 2 221

Today, I found out that the odor-absorbing gel I found a few days ago, of which I'd thoroughly read the instructions for and thought was a deodorant, was actually a bathroom cleaner. I've been using it for the past 3 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 451

You deserved it 2 093

Today, I came home from work to find construction workers repaving my street. I work the graveyard shift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 390

You deserved it 106

Today, I finally got to attend the concert I have been anticipating for weeks. The band was great. The drunk guy sitting behind me yelling profanity and out of tune lyrics in my ear throughout the entire show, however, was not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 187

You deserved it 2 218