Health: Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere...

By fuck right off - 04/04/2015 17:32 - United Kingdom - Coalville

Today, as I was walking to work, a cyclist shot out of nowhere and slammed into me. I hit the ground hard and lay there in agony. The guy quickly dusted himself off, said "Sorry man. It's a vicious cycle." then chuckled at his own stupid pun and cycled away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 552

You deserved it 3 031

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Same thing different taste

By i hit a cyclist - 27/05/2013 11:19 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, I accidentally hit a cyclist with my car. In panic, I jumped out of my car and ran up to him, who was lying on the floor, motionless. As I was about to check his pulse, he jumped up and shouted, "I bet you thought I was dead, asshole!" He then punched me in the face and cycled off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 094

You deserved it 25 639

Crushed

By Anonymous - 12/08/2012 23:08 - United States - Saddle Brook

Today, while on my morning jog, I turned a corner, and out of nowhere, the business end of a bicycle hit me straight in the nuts. As I collapsed, gasping in agony, the guy who just killed a hundred million of my potential children got back on his bike and cycled away without a word. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 494

You deserved it 2 328

By Tequila - 20/06/2011 16:12 - Netherlands

Today, my bike abruptly stopped working, torpedoing me headfirst into the sidewalk. I lay there in agony for a few minutes, and the only guy who saw it happen said, "Lucky you didn't get hurt!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 598

You deserved it 3 219

By dumbasdogshit - 11/08/2012 00:45 - Australia - Gold Coast

Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 810

You deserved it 2 554

Breaking the law (and bones)

By Carl - 18/09/2022 20:30

Today, I came out from the E.R. with an arm cast and stitches on my head, all because a cyclist ran me over on a pedestrian walkway and got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 93

By Anonymous - 18/04/2013 21:02 - Bulgaria - Batanovci

Today, I was riding my bike home from the store. Wanting to impress some passers-by, I tried to do a trick on a sharp turn. I hit a pole with my balls. As I was lying on the ground in agony, a guy pulled over, took a picture, and took off laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 431

You deserved it 51 121

By Anonymous - 29/04/2016 17:59 - United States

Today, some guy on a bike kept taunting me about my weight while I was out jogging. He ended up hitting a street lamp and fell off his bike. I had a real good laugh at him for all of 5 seconds before he got mad and really made me run. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 155

You deserved it 2 260

By ramble ramble - 30/01/2014 20:55 - United States - Monroe

Today, I was taking a leisurely stroll through the woods in the nice cool weather, when a mountain biker came out of nowhere and tore past, barely missing me. As I counted my luck, another biker followed the first and crashed right into me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 802

You deserved it 4 430

BIKES

By ihpgolj - 18/06/2009 05:31 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike down a road I know is quite hazardous. Having almost been hit in the same spot the day before, I rode across the intersection very satisfied without having been injured. Until I crashed into the guy front of me and flipped over my handlebars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 884

You deserved it 43 990

Sorry!

By My hip hurts - 23/01/2023 01:00

Today, I got hit by a car while going out for a jog. As I writhed on the floor in pain, I heard the driver say, “Sorry!” and the sound of tires squealing. He’d sped off. I didn’t get a chance to get his license plate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 003

You deserved it 112

ilytyvm 25

Sunday 5 April 2015 5:57

I have to admit, that was kind of a good one... Sorry for the incident, though. That does suck.

tournamentdecide 33

Sunday 5 April 2015 5:57

That guy sounds like someone who would comment on here.

Comments

King_paradox 22

Sunday 5 April 2015 9:26

Excuse me sir. I did at least make sure you weren't completely dead before I cycled off.. It's a vicious cycle..

Wsparta 26

Sunday 5 April 2015 10:17

As a cyclist, I really wonder if half the folks on bikes (or in cars for that matter) pay attention to where they are going. Sorry for what happened though, OP.

AndyPurdy 31

Sunday 5 April 2015 11:16

im so sorry dude,its a vicious cycle

drunk_crow 12

Sunday 5 April 2015 11:58

Really all puns are stupid

Liu1992 14

Sunday 5 April 2015 12:09

Tomorrow you wait there with a rock in your hand.

Based_Muhmd 12

Sunday 5 April 2015 12:48

I'm really sorry to say this, but that was a really good pun. I hope you are okay though.

hsbzjsnsos 12

Sunday 5 April 2015 13:07

What a dick

notfat14 18

Sunday 5 April 2015 13:20

Probably one of those dickheads that ride on the road when there's a path

abNormal62 23

Sunday 5 April 2015 13:53

That's awesome! I laughed so hard and read at again and laughed once again I don't think I will ever "tire" of this story

russfml 31

Sunday 5 April 2015 15:05

Soon cyclist will have a vicious cycle with idiots like him. Drivers hate cyclists and now pedestrians will as well On the other hand hilarious pun lol.. FYL OP