Animals: Today, I painted my nails in the car. After I finished, I stuck...

By ew - 03/08/2014 18:49 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I painted my nails in the car. After I finished, I stuck my hands out the window to let them dry. When I pulled my hands back in there were live bugs stuck in my nail polish. FML

agreeclassic 25 546

vote type 1 50 008

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By anditburnsburnsburns - 27/08/2013 18:13 - United States - Midlothian

Today, I was in a rush, so I was removing my nail polish while using the toilet. Everything was going fine, until I used the toilet paper in my hand to wipe. It was covered in nail polish remover. It still burns. FML

agreeclassic 39 304

vote type 1 20 794

By Snow - 07/02/2009 20:43 - United States

Today, while I was trying to take off my eye make up, I accidentally used nail polish remover. FML

agreeclassic 20 778

vote type 1 35 119

By WeldedShut - 03/03/2017 18:00

Today, I was with a wedding party getting manicures. I absentmindedly used a freshly-painted nail to pick my nose and ended up with two beauticians scraping indestructible bright red gel varnish out of my left nostril with acetone soaked q-tips, while everyone sat waiting in complete silence. FML

agreeclassic 3 784

vote type 1 8 291

By crazyvulva9216 - 27/01/2009 01:17 - United States

Today, I got bored on the toilet and decided to paint my nails. I ended up having to wait half an hour to wipe. FML

agreeclassic 8 831

vote type 1 68 961

By inosehowthatgotthere - 10/02/2011 01:12 - United States

Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML

agreeclassic 9 360

vote type 1 52 606

By Anonymous - 11/06/2012 12:42 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I got a new set of acrylic nails put on. While driving home, I had an urge to pick my nose. My car then went over a speed-bump. I now feel like my brain is bleeding. FML

agreeclassic 10 115

vote type 1 46 251

By bad luck Bianca - 17/01/2015 22:30 - United States - Houston

Today, I saw a stick in my car and picked it up to throw it out the window. The "stick" turned out to have eyes. It was a dead lizard. FML

agreeclassic 26 859

vote type 1 10 207

By Anonymous - 30/04/2009 04:52 - United States

Today, my girlfriend bought this hot pink Chanel nail polish. Bored, she thought it would be funny to paint my nails. I finally gave in and let her paint my toe nails. After she left, my buddy calls to to see if I can give him a ride. I forgot I had a swim meet today. FML

agreeclassic 17 033

vote type 1 54 373

By Anonymous - 10/03/2010 20:53 - United States

Today, I started biting my nails, before I realized I'd forgotten to wash my hands after taking a massive dump. FML

agreeclassic 6 435

vote type 1 61 527

On the runs

By coloneltushfinger - this FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, I did the best at-home manicure I’ve ever had. I took my time and it looked like it was done professionally. As soon as I put on the top coat and waited for it to dry, my stomach rumbled and I had to run to take a dump. The polish smeared everywhere, ruining the whole thing. FML

agreeclassic 1 930

vote type 1 483

cjwayy 22

Monday 4 August 2014 0:42

Why would you paint your nails in your car? What if you had spilled?

DippinGrizzly907 27

Monday 4 August 2014 0:43

Well that sure makes for a sticky situation. Doesn't it bug you whenever you mess up your nail polish?

Comments

alex540150 9

Monday 4 August 2014 1:59

Please tell me you weren't driving. Please.

Futacy 29

Monday 4 August 2014 2:08

Jesus woman, have some patience.

tournamentdecide 33

Monday 4 August 2014 2:21

Why not use the AC vent?

rocker_chick23 27

Monday 4 August 2014 3:26

The nail polish fumes must have fogged her brain making her lack common sense. Or she might be naturally stupid.

thisismyhead 25

Monday 4 August 2014 2:22

Sounds like a new trend waiting to happen!

kendallfireHD 16

Monday 4 August 2014 2:27

You deserve it for painting you're nails in the car. How does that sound like a good idea?

haleyrob 8

Monday 4 August 2014 2:48

I hate it when that happens!

UNLUCKYyY1037 26

Monday 4 August 2014 2:54

How did the bugs survive the impact?

slyde32 12

Monday 4 August 2014 3:13

she never said they survived, dead bugs would get stuck in the nail polish

emily4040 18

Monday 4 August 2014 3:19

It said live bugs #47

heyithinkyourhot 12

Monday 4 August 2014 3:03

Oh yuck

pussystank 18

Monday 4 August 2014 3:12

Why some people automatically assume it's a she? It could've been a gothic man.

auctiongirl 10

Monday 4 August 2014 3:14

Next time hold your hand in front of the side mirror . Bugs hit mirror instead of your freshly painter nails. Presto!

rocker_chick23 27

Monday 4 August 2014 3:29

Or just use the AC vent. Presto

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I got a serious infection following a medically necessary circumcision, and my doctor told me they will probably have to remove even more of the skin where the infection is particularly aggressive. My knob is gonna look like Freddy Krueger's face on a bad day. FML

agreeclassic 1 748

vote type 1 152

Today, I learned to never eat chicken wings, loaded mashed potatoes with sour cream, cheese, bacon, ranch, and bubbly soda prior to a esthetician appointment. I had uncontrollable gas and made the most foul smelling farts in her face while she was trying to wax my butthole. I was asked to leave. FML

agreeclassic 263

vote type 1 2 260

Today, I started my cure from my opioid addiction. My whole body is so sore, I'm lying in bed and I'm still hurting to the point that I cried half the day, and nothing will make me feel any better. FML

agreeclassic 535

vote type 1 214

Today, I took a pregnancy test because I'd missed a few periods, gained weight, and been moody. Turns out I'm just fat and moody. FML

agreeclassic 50 611

vote type 1 11 673

Today, tired of my roommate’s constant stealing of my food, I decided to get back at him by hiding a small amount of hot sauce in his sandwich, thinking it would be a funny prank. When he took a huge bite, he immediately started choking and running to the bathroom. I later found out he's allergic to spicy food. FML

agreeclassic 501

vote type 1 178

Today, I dog-sat for my neighbors' pitbull. Weighing in at 100 pounds with a nasty bite, this dog is no lap dog, but I treated it as one - not knowing how deadly this dog could be - beckoning it towards me with my hand. I now have 6 stitches in my hand and arm, and the neighbors didn't pay me. FML

agreeclassic 52 281

vote type 1 17 921

Similar FMLs

On the runs

TOP COMMENTS

Comments