When I try to quit junk food By Lewis - 08/12/2018 18:00 I'm not a quitter! I agree, your life sucks 282 You deserved it 94 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was so totally stressed out at work that I took my car into the park and reclined my seat and shut my eyes. Soon I noticed the soothing sounds of raindrops on my car and I felt a little better for once. I opened my eyes to see that a bunch of birds had crapped all over my car. FML I agree, your life sucks 40 499 You deserved it 3 771
Today, I came home from work to find my kids playing Frisbee with my collection of rare, valuable vinyl records. The term "smash hit record" took on a whole new meaning. FML I agree, your life sucks 29 528 You deserved it 2 909
Today, I was at a club when a notoriously desperate and disgusting guy asked me to grind with him. Hoping for some backup, I coolly said, "You'll have to ask my boyfriend." My boyfriend's response? "Yeah, man, I don't care." FML I agree, your life sucks 38 736 You deserved it 8 549
Today, my mother used climate change as an excuse for not remembering my birthday. FML I agree, your life sucks 35 233 You deserved it 2 757
Today, my boyfriend dislocated my jaw by sitting on my face while trying to fart on it. FML I agree, your life sucks 5 732 You deserved it 876
Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML I agree, your life sucks 41 204 You deserved it 87 564
Yup that's me when there is white chocolate in the house 😋