Animals: Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping... - FML

By Deconstructed - 19/05/2009 20:13 - United States

Today, my husband let me sleep in while he worked on the landscaping by our backyard pool. Ready for a shower, I stripped naked, opened the back door to let the dog out, and stepped out to ask him how it was going. Turns out he'd finally hired a landscaping crew. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 115

You deserved it 28 011

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

One man and his lawn

By Anonymous - 14/09/2021 16:00 - United States - Little Rock

Today, my husband, who rarely helps with big projects around the house, offered to help me with our mess of a backyard. An hour and a half into the project, and an hour and a half after he disappeared from the backyard, I found him mowing and edging the front. Our front yard was immaculate and didn't need mowed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 850

You deserved it 134

All over the place

By Anonymous - 01/06/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I got super psyched up about a landscaping project my wife denied last year that she's finally game for, which will both fix a water leak into the house, and make our backyard look amazing. I took a week of PTO, then 20 minutes later my wife called to tell me a tree in our back yard fell over. We're also probably getting divorced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 107

By Hunterxx - 07/08/2010 05:21 - United States

Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 783

You deserved it 7 240

Nuts

By dieders - 21/11/2016 06:34 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up and opened my curtains to see my gardener up a ladder in front of my window tending to the plants growing up the side of the wall. This would've been fine if his ballsack wasn't hanging out his shorts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 857

You deserved it 1 153

By TmWhisp - 13/05/2016 10:02 - United States

Today, I found out what my husband meant when he said he "accidentally installed an indoor pool" last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 54

By Anonymous - 27/10/2010 14:37 - United States

Today, when I got home from work, my fiancé was finishing up with the plumber who had just installed new fixtures for our shower. I decided that I was going to be the first to break it in. I went to the bathroom, got undressed and went to start the water. The OTHER plumber was still in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 024

You deserved it 27 743

Oh, hi

By Fifi - 16/04/2018 05:00

Today, my husband popped out to the hotel gym while I jumped in the shower. After a while I heard a knock on the door. Thinking it was him, I cheekily opened the door in my naked glory to be greeted by the maid. I didn’t know do-not-disturb signs aren’t double sided. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 554

You deserved it 3 468

By wherefelix - 03/07/2009 08:01 - United States

Today, I woke up early, showered, dressed, and made the 40 minute drive to work, only to discover when I arrived that today was my day off. When I got home my live in boyfriend was gone. I called and he told me he was at the beach, right near my work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 149

You deserved it 9 528

By Anonymous - 06/11/2010 04:31 - United States

Today, after getting out of the shower, I was in a good mood. So I decided to run around the house naked, then play air guitar while air drying, just for fun. My blinds were open, and the men in the Fedex truck in my front yard did have fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 633

You deserved it 34 584

Alexa, play "Can't Stand Me Now" by The Libertines

By Anonymous - 08/12/2023 12:00 - United States - Richmond

Today, after weeks of slaving away, I finally wrapped up the last house project on the backlog. I decided to take a day to relax around the house in celebration. My wife spent all day following me around, moaning that I never go anywhere, and that she never gets any space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 586

You deserved it 114

Next

Top comments

life_is_life 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:12

you stepped outside naked? LOL. well, dont worry i bet they enjoyed it.

Yeoman 0

Wednesday 20 May 2009 2:12

haha thats awesome. Im sure they loved that job, and theyll be back ANYTIME.

Comments

califormula 0

Sunday 24 October 2010 18:19

Those must have been some surprised Mexicans!

avianator 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 23:27

they probabily enjoyed it and you might get a discount too (:

bigassfish97 0

Wednesday 10 August 2011 3:55

Hahaha YDI

wispywee 0

Friday 26 August 2011 18:11

wtf?? YDI for walking around naked

wispywee 0

Friday 26 August 2011 18:13

LOL 115

TrollisMe 5

Wednesday 26 October 2011 6:08

Did you at least offer lemonade?

floatguy 2

Tuesday 1 November 2011 16:58

LMAO!!!! omg thats ausome;))))!!!!!!

lexielou07 18

Sunday 4 December 2011 21:55

why would you get naked before letting your dog out?

ZeroIce 12

Saturday 24 December 2011 16:31

why would you step outside naked in the first place?

nfjskcbdkdjdjdn 2

Saturday 7 January 2012 1:24

You… talk to your husband naked?

11
12
13
14
15

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, while using a portable restroom at the park, I discovered all too late that some very hostile and territorial hornets had made it their home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 385

You deserved it 1 741

Today, I was unloading tile boxes out of my pickup truck into this lady's garage. As I grabbed the last 50-pound box, a passing bird shat on my forehead. Green ooze ran down my whole face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 822

You deserved it 172

Today, I saw a blond-haired guy crouched by my bike fiddling with something as I came back from the shop. Thinking he was a thief, I slammed him across the head with my helmet, knocked him over - then I realised not only was he a kid barely in his teens, he was tying his shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 789

You deserved it 46 353

Today, I went to a yoga class, thinking it would be good for my stiff calf from running. I pulled my back out doing the downward dog. Now can't get out of bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 153

Today, I caught my cat humping my dog while he was asleep. I'm sleeping with the door closed from now on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 332

You deserved it 3 854

Today, it's Black Friday. I got sucker-punched by some woman over a ten dollar griddle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 165

You deserved it 6 151