Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up with a hangover, a shaved head, and my period....

By Anonymous - 25/11/2010 17:54 - United States

Today, I woke up with a hangover, a shaved head, and my period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 162

You deserved it 24 377

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Same thing different taste

By hedayk - 15/05/2015 20:26 - United States - Bronx

Today, I woke up so hungover that when I went to the bathroom and caught sight of myself in the mirror, I screamed, slipped backwards, and smashed my head against the rim of my bathtub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 281

You deserved it 12 032

Leaking from everywhere

By Anonymous - 28/04/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I woke up bleeding from every orifice in my body. I've got a nose bleed from my medication, my gums bled when I brushed my teeth, I'm on my period, and I have hemorrhoids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 509

You deserved it 89

Spectacle

By chunderful202 - 24/12/2012 08:46 - United Kingdom - Romford

Today, I woke up with a hangover from hell. My clothes were stained with vomit, I was propped up on the sofa with a bowl between my knees, and my hair tied to one side. My mum was taking photos to send to Grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 815

You deserved it 41 570

By Lolly - 12/09/2018 23:30

Today, I have a UTI that spread to my kidneys, a yeast infection, and a herpes outbreak. Oh, and my period came this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 302

You deserved it 838

The planets aligned

By Anonymous - 15/08/2022 18:00 - United States

Today, I started a new job. I also started my period, and have the shits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 118

By babygurl69 - 20/01/2009 21:38 - Canada

Today, I woke up with a hangover, but went to school anyway without showering, applying makeup, and still wearing my pajama bottoms. While taking the subway, I bumped into my ex-boyfriend who I hadn't seen a year. His new girlfriend looked at me and said, "You look... tired." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 801

You deserved it 24 043

The body keeps the score

By Anonymous - 02/12/2022 17:00 - United Kingdom - Pontefract

Today, I started my period, complete with cramps, diarrhoea, a headache, bloating, and aching legs. Apparently my body didn't get the message that I had a total hysterectomy a month ago, including my ovaries, tubes and cervix. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 080

You deserved it 121

By Anonymous - 22/09/2018 13:30

Today, I apparently had diarrhea in my sleep. I had to get up and sneak to the bathroom so as to not wake my husband. When he asked about the stain, I panicked and told him I started my period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 606

You deserved it 435

By Unlucky - 24/05/2010 00:22 - Australia

Today, I have both a cold and a period. Tomorrow, I will have a cold, my period and my wisdom teeth taken out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 479

You deserved it 3 805

By Username - 11/08/2019 16:00 - United States

Today, I have a horrible hangover. My mom also decided it was a good day to go hiking. I ended up puking on the trail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 847

You deserved it 1 571

renaet 0

Thursday 25 November 2010 23:32

At least your not pregnant :]

magaliwoodrock 19

Thursday 25 November 2010 23:24

WOW, That really sucks

Comments

lovestoomassage 0

Friday 26 November 2010 7:37

lol Damm.... fyl...

BabesYourAStar 0

Friday 26 November 2010 8:29

YDI.

laniL_fml 0

Friday 26 November 2010 9:16

Sucks to your asmar! ha ha.

YourWetDream 0

Friday 26 November 2010 10:41

Is this a reference to the book Lord of the Flies? lolz I hated that book

Aoife_ckyou 0

Friday 26 November 2010 10:40

all evidence points to the op being britney spears.

wriptidez 0

Friday 26 November 2010 12:45

dont get drunk

Andy4443 0

Friday 26 November 2010 13:06

could your name be Britney spears?

apv12 0

Friday 26 November 2010 13:43

it could be worse: you could wake up pregnant and with a stranger in your bed

agilldesign 0

Friday 26 November 2010 13:58

I agree that is a crappy way to wake up

benmyers 0

Friday 26 November 2010 16:29

just like brittney spears

MaJiN_fml 2

Friday 26 November 2010 16:52

win

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The Top

Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 202

You deserved it 4 789

Today, I spontaneously poured my heart out for my boyfriend, telling him how much I love and adore him. He answered by leaning in close, saying, "Jolly good" in an affected accent, and burping loud and clear in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 504

You deserved it 5 108

Today, my therapist told me to write down my secrets in an envelope and symbolically burn them. My secrets included stories of my rampant sex life, drug use, a suicide attempt, and the overpowering hatred I have for my family. I've managed to misplace the envelope somewhere back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 521

You deserved it 22 432

Today, I went to my favorite bar after work for a drink. On my way to the porch out back, I didn't realize the sliding glass door was shut, and walked straight into it. I was stone cold sober, but the bartender refused to believe me, and cut me off before my first beer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 485

You deserved it 4 447

Today, my boyfriend tried to claim he can’t eat me out because he has a short tongue, a genuine medical condition that means he can’t do it properly. Funny, because I’ve seen him use that short tongue to completely clean out a Cadbury Creme Egg before without issue. He’s now sulking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 93

Today, I awkwardly had to comfort my 32 year old friend when he broke down crying in the middle of a crowded McDonald's. Apparently they no longer serve barbecue bacon cheeseburgers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 047

You deserved it 3 756