Kids: Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs...

By beya - 31/08/2009 22:05 - Canada

Today, I woke up to my five year old son picking off the scabs from his chicken pox and dropping them into my open mouth as I slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94 000

You deserved it 5 898

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Same thing different taste

By life insurance for 1 - 30/05/2013 16:29 - United States - Encino

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 717

You deserved it 5 588

By Scabby - 11/04/2012 09:53 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend pulling off scabs and eating them. My scabs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 517

You deserved it 3 645

By Lorena - 21/04/2012 19:26 - United States - Kapolei

Today, just three days into a much-needed vacation, my 5-year-old daughter has come down with chickenpox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 108

You deserved it 3 250

By Pimpleeater - 20/12/2011 07:45 - New Zealand

Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 481

You deserved it 5 686

Natural selection

By Anonymous - 29/11/2024 13:00 - Canada - Minnedosa

Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 197

You deserved it 419

By todaddy - 23/05/2014 19:32 - United Kingdom

Today, my 5-year-old son woke up early and ran into my bedroom to wake me up. Unfortunately, he did this by jumping onto my bed, slamming his knee into my balls in the process. I had to explain my tears of agony away by claiming I was just so happy to see him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 241

You deserved it 4 779

By sickmom - 21/01/2014 11:07 - United States - New Orleans

Today, I have the flu. I woke up to my son leaning over me, inches from my face, breathing in deeply. Apparently, he was trying to get sick so he could stay home from school. He's 15. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 640

You deserved it 5 528

By mafiaguy800 - 27/08/2019 14:00

Today, I woke up to see my four year-old brother with a sharpie, trying to play “Connect the Dots” with my acne. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 528

You deserved it 154

By Spotted - 18/02/2009 22:09 - Canada

Today, at Church, the little boy sitting behind me asked his mother if I had the chicken pox, because there were red dots all over my face. I've had bad acne since I was twelve. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 338

You deserved it 3 977

By ellieowenie - 29/07/2012 08:11 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 776

You deserved it 3 443

Fernmelder 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:37

that is nasty

crazychika 0

Tuesday 1 September 2009 1:38

Ewwwww! What a little bugger! Yea... here's one reason why I'm NOT having kids :P

Comments

Crazyseth 0

Saturday 26 September 2009 1:52

ewwwwwwww

Boom402 0

Thursday 5 November 2009 20:55

ewwww FYL, beat the little bugger

Jasoco 0

Sunday 29 November 2009 4:31

Chicken pox?? That still exists??

CarterColbie 4

Monday 30 November 2009 5:44

Yuck. But your son has another thing coming, those chicken pox he picked are gonna leave ugly scars. I picked mine when I had them and I have scars on my necks and chest.

toddin 7

Tuesday 19 January 2010 10:37

disgusting... of all the things I can stomache just the thought of that made me gag... yuck FYL

flippyyfeatherr 0

Friday 19 February 2010 12:17

awe WTF I'm about to eat thanx

erisco 0

Sunday 14 March 2010 10:47

hahaha fyl I'd beat me a kid

glambert1998 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 3:51

mmmmm nummy(not yummy) *pukes*

Dani_Turner 0

Wednesday 27 October 2010 0:51

this made me wanna puke.

silverstar210 0

Thursday 5 May 2011 1:49

EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW THAT IS SOOOO GROSS! FYL x100,000,000,000,000,000,000

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Today, while I was taking a test in class, there was a question that had everyone stumped. After what seemed like forever, the teacher finally noticed and said he'd typed the question wrong. I spent more than half the time I had to complete the test on a question that wasn't even written correctly. Yes, I failed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 893

You deserved it 459

Today, my long-distance boyfriend was at my house for a 10-day visit. He told me that we'd never spent so much time together, so he didn't know me well and now, he'd finally met the "real me". He doesn't like it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 838

You deserved it 9 643

Today, I turned on my A/C for the first time in a couple of months. A family of ginormous cockroaches climbed out of the air vent and a few clumps of dead cockroaches fell to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 130

You deserved it 488

Today, after my 22-year-old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 545

You deserved it 12 571

Today, the car in front of me in the drop-off area at my son's school parked, and the driver got out. I basically leaned on my horn and gave her every dirty look in the book. She said nothing but stared at me as she opened the back of her van to unload her child's wheelchair. I'm an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 848

You deserved it 76 018

Today, I realized that our generation will be remembered as the kids who liked sparkly vampires. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 543

You deserved it 13 516

Same thing different taste

Natural selection

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