Pranks and Miscellaneous: Today, I was woken up by my dad screaming that the ship was sinking....

By Anonymous - 16/08/2016 08:26 - United States - Wasilla

Today, I was woken up by my dad screaming that the ship was sinking. I started freaking out before I realized that I was sleeping on my couch at home and was not in fact on a ship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 898

You deserved it 1 816

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Same thing different taste

By Chris - 03/04/2011 17:41 - United States

Today, I was awoken by my dad yelling into my ear. In shock, I jumped up off the couch, and came smashing down into the coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 673

You deserved it 4 135

By nick - 22/03/2009 00:06 - United States

Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 273

You deserved it 13 308

By esoog - 19/05/2011 17:38 - United States

Today, I woke up in a panic to what sounded like a plane about to crash into my house. I was so scared, I peed myself and passed out. It was just my cell phone vibrating under my pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 533

You deserved it 48 425

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 19:03 - Canada

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 640

You deserved it 34 466

Occam's razor

By anonymous - 12/02/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 837

You deserved it 4 725

By BedazzledAlpaca - 08/12/2014 05:03 - United States - Englewood

Today, I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to find that I had slept through my house getting robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 868

You deserved it 4 314

Night terrors

By Anonymous - 10/12/2022 00:00 - United States - Cecil

Today, I woke up from another nightmare, this time drowning in a rogue wave. I could feel the water and rain. I could feel myself gasping for air as I don't know how to swim, and can barely float. I'm scared if I die in my sleep, I die for real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 186

Neglect

By Very caring parents - 26/02/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I'm staying at my parents' house. I was woken up by the fan in my bedroom falling down. I calmly picked it back up and went to bed, wondering why my parents weren't concerned at all. My mom said she figured it was nothing, and when my dad tried to say something, she retorted, "You didn't even wake up!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 113

By Anonymous - 29/08/2015 17:08 - Canada - Gatineau

Today, I blacked out while hugging my dad. I woke up a minute later on the floor with my dad telling me to, "quit being lazy and get up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 272

You deserved it 1 563

Spooked

By screamo - 02/05/2009 20:44 - United Kingdom

Today, my alarm went off at 6:30am. I woke up disorientated, as usual. I looked up and saw a dark, mysterious figure entering my room. Still half asleep, I screamed and dived under my covers. The dark, mysterious figure was my mom. I'm a 21 year-old guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 866

You deserved it 46 807

MandyO 15

Sunday 11 September 2016 11:19

And if you decide to have children someday, you will do the same.

MikuandKaito 24

Sunday 11 September 2016 11:03

Gotta love dads.

Comments

Jurbla 14

Sunday 11 September 2016 17:02

Wait, was your dad sleep talking? Drunk? High? Having a flashback? Suffering from dementia? This is the most mysterious FML I've ever read!

Danne696 14

Sunday 11 September 2016 18:39

OP's dad wasn't sleeping, OP was. Dad waked OP up by shouting that the ship was sinking, presumably as a prank.

Arot6 17

Sunday 11 September 2016 20:59

You've gotta give him points for creativity. It's actually kind of beautiful.

guesswhatlifesux 14

Sunday 11 September 2016 21:55

FYL for being woken up by your screaming father. But YDI for thinking you were on a ship.

andrmac 25

Sunday 11 September 2016 22:15

I'm assuming he wasn't thrilled about you crashing on the couch so he decided to sink your ship.

Shadowpartner 11

Monday 12 September 2016 14:08

Maybe he was watching The Titanic for the first time?

Achuu 9

Monday 12 September 2016 20:13

Probably the best dad joke I've read

IndridWarm 23

Monday 12 September 2016 22:00

Once I woke up during a small earthquake and (influenced by the dream I had had) thought I was in world war 2 getting bombed by Germans.

Jonjon554 16

Wednesday 14 September 2016 21:10

I don't blame you. Most people wake up confused when things are being yelled and whatnot. Hell, when my girlfriend take a nap at my house, she usually wakes up asking where she is lol