Intimacy: Today, I asked my mom why she had two tooth brushes: one manual...

By Vincent - 02/01/2014 05:04 - United States - Overland Park

Today, I asked my mom why she had two tooth brushes: one manual and one electric. She said: "I only use the manual one for brushing my teeth." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 156

You deserved it 8 340

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Same thing different taste

No fun allowed

By but cum to think of it... - 03/07/2015 21:29

Today, my extremely religious mom ranted at me, saying I'd only bought an electric toothbrush so I could masturbate with it. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 399

You deserved it 2 299

By uofpalum - 19/03/2009 01:41 - United States

Today, I stayed over at my grandparents' house. I woke up and had to brush my teeth. My grandma asked if I had found a toothbrush to use. I told her that I used my old purple toothbrush. She told me that was the toothbrush she used to brush her toenails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 499

You deserved it 10 815

By gross - 02/05/2015 18:39 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, I changed my toothbrush because the bristles were wearing down. My brother later asked me why I changed his toothbrush. Apparently we've been sharing the same one for the past several weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 059

You deserved it 3 982

By Anonymous - 25/01/2015 07:01 - United States

Today, I bought an electric toothbrush because they're supposed to be a lot healthier than regular ones. My crazy religious mom immediately called me a whore and said she knew what I really wanted to use it for. So that's $80 in the trash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 539

You deserved it 2 848

Get me out of this shithole

By nothing is sacred - 23/02/2017 12:00 - United States - Reynoldsburg

Today, I caught my mom using my toothbrush and washcloth again, despite her having both her own bathroom and supplies. I asked her to please not use mine, to which she called me an ungrateful bitch. My dad agreed. Yet they wonder why I've been desperately saving money to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 576

You deserved it 504

Best teeth in the game

By jj. - 08/09/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, as always, my mom loudly asked me if I'd brushed my teeth, then replied to my yes with, “I don’t believe you.” All because I forgot to brush my teeth once when I was 5. I’m 17 now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 429

You deserved it 73

By thechaos - 15/12/2014 22:24 - United States - Pittsfield

Today, my family got into a massive argument about whether or not battery-operated toothbrushes are considered electric toothbrushes. Everyone is in their own room and refuses to talk to each other. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 629

You deserved it 4 247

Cooked

By Anonymous - 08/03/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother cooked breakfast for everyone at my house. Then I later found one of my sex toys in the sink. I “casually” asked her what she used it for, and turns out she used it to make everyone’s scrambled eggs. She thought it was an electric egg whisk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 646

Gross

By nikki - 10/10/2010 00:47 - United States

Today, my mom realized we have been sharing tooth brushes because they are similar colors. I told her it doesn't really matter since we're mother and daughter. She responded by saying that she loves me, but she has no idea where my mouth has been, and she doesn't want my diseases. Thanks mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 030

You deserved it 11 191

By Anonymous - 08/09/2015 18:46 - United States - Anchorage

Today, I told my boss I need a scrub brush to properly clean the stairs at my workplace. She gave me an old toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 378

You deserved it 1 881

jonahwalzer 12

Thursday 2 January 2014 12:22

I would not touch the other one if i were you....

Broadway_Vayne 32

Thursday 2 January 2014 12:23

Good luck getting that picture out of your head! I'd be scarred for life if I had that happen to me...

Comments

sasquatchNKY 2

Thursday 2 January 2014 22:58

Four out of 5 female dentists recommend it.

davincidasecond 24

Friday 3 January 2014 1:04

So I guess you know what she's up to if she's in the bathroom for a long while.

ashjo 12

Friday 3 January 2014 2:08

bet your sorry you ever asked ahahahha

GemmaAnne 10

Friday 3 January 2014 2:28

Vibrators are expensive these days! Lol hm be careful of what tooth brush you grab......

sabrinalynn22 19

Friday 3 January 2014 6:08

EW EW EW EW EW

MaryPoppins88 14

Friday 3 January 2014 6:11

Ewwwwwwww TMI

FMLworthy5000 21

Friday 3 January 2014 8:02

Throw it out

flufee2 27

Friday 3 January 2014 8:10

Curiosity killed the cat... OP i think your a cat!

an3ph 20

Friday 3 January 2014 8:24

This is why it is wise to think of possible answers before asking questions.

BoltTheSuperdog 22

Friday 3 January 2014 9:59

If you know what I mean...

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Today, I was buying an expensive pillow for my mother from a store clerk who wouldn't stop staring at my boobs. After paying, I saw an elderly lady who had dropped a bag, so I walked to help. I walked back to the clerk, who refused to believe I paid. The reason? He didn't recognize my face. FML

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Today, my dog was riding my car's passenger seat. He clambered over onto my lap, causing me to lose control of the wheel for a few seconds. As I tried to knock him off me, I lost track of my speed, and ended up being pulled over for reckless driving. FML

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Today, I begged the people at my new job not to call my current boss for a reference because he is a vindictive dog shite. They called him for a reference, he tanked me, they believed him and withdrew my job offer. My boss also sacked me for disloyalty, thus proving he’s a vindictive dog shite. FML

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You deserved it 98