Sex, Farts and Intimacy: Sneaky - FML

Sneaky

By crazy_bitch122 - 29/06/2011 05:13 - United States

Spicy

Today, while we were making love, he farted, then blamed it on his dog, who wasn't even in the room. The smell alone could have killed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 651

You deserved it 6 308

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Same thing different taste

A load of hot air

By SkipBeatOtaku - 16/05/2020 20:00

Spicy

Today, I was having hot sex with my boyfriend. Then, I felt a puff of air hit my face and a rancid smell. My dog had farted in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 743

You deserved it 716

Still funny though

By Jeff - 29/04/2022 02:00

Spicy

Today, my wife and I were getting intimate with for the first time in a while, as I haven't been home, when the foul stench of our dog's fart made us gag. Mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 035

You deserved it 214

Sexy back

By Anonymous - 19/11/2017 06:00

Spicy

Today, in the middle of sex, I was desperate for a fart but tried to hold it in so we weren't forced to stop halfway. Unfortunately, I accidentally let the fart escape, along with runny diarrhea, all over my husband's legs and groin. The smell caused him to vomit all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 575

You deserved it 2 862

Bad omen

By Anonymous - 17/11/2013 13:34 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 813

You deserved it 4 369

First time?

By Anonymous - 31/07/2021 23:01 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy

Today, my long-term boyfriend and I went on a romantic getaway. In the hotel we were having great sex, I was so close to… and then he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 970

You deserved it 319

Likely story

By Gabriela - 23/11/2011 01:00

Spicy

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he farted. He blamed it on a "nearby frog." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 841

You deserved it 5 909

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 336

You deserved it 5 079

Love is in the air

By Rydia - 31/10/2020 05:01

Today, my fiancé hugged me so tight that I couldn't move, said he loved me, let out a loud, obnoxious and smelly fart cloud and made me breathe it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 978

You deserved it 199

Rico Suave

By eww - 12/06/2025 20:00 - Czechia - Prague

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex, but every time he thrust into me, he farted. Loud, smelly, wet farts. After a minute, I shoved him off and demanded he take a dump. After a full five minutes of loud diarrhea, he came back to bed, his ass stinking of sewage. My pussy dried up so fast… FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 107

By fatti11 - 14/01/2017 18:00

Today, during an argument that he couldn't win, my boyfriend farted in a glass, covered it with his hand, ran to me, and let it go it right in front of my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 882

You deserved it 1 134

Next

Top comments

marinus_fml 19

Wednesday 29 June 2011 12:00

At least he didn't shit on the sheets.

loveexgirl 15

Wednesday 29 June 2011 12:37

27 ... wtf?

Comments

Gigaboo 0

Friday 9 December 2011 4:58

did he fart or queef?

nikazone 0

Saturday 10 November 2012 4:55

First of all if your not intelligent enough to make a proper sentence your probably not smart enough to understand passing gas is natural. Which probably means you should be taking this time to learn how to tighten your helmet not attempt to write an FML. FYL good try though, stickers for everyone.

MisUnFortunate 31

Tuesday 3 December 2013 2:10

"...if your not intelligent enough" Yeah you're done.

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Today, I thought I'd locked my house keys in my locker at work. Not having any replacement nearby, I decided to cut the padlock with the saw of my pocket-knife. It took 20 minutes and four cuts into my hand to destroy the padlock. It took another five seconds to find the missing key in my jacket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 488

You deserved it 21 357

Today, after almost four years of friendship. My "good friend" blocked me on Facebook, after I joked with him about his team losing. I'm a huge fan of the winning team. FML

I agree, your life sucks 896

You deserved it 216

Today, I staged an intervention for my dad, because his midlife crisis has spun out of control. When I told him he's now basically endangering his own life, he replied "Everyone's gonna die someday. Some sooner than others, eh porky?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 898

You deserved it 2 311

Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend, she was grabbing the fat on my stomach. I said to her, "Quit touching my fat!" She replied, "So don't touch you at all?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 911

You deserved it 25 005

Today, I called the college of my dreams to check the status of my application. Turns out they "never received" copies of my transcripts. They did however cash the $70 application fee that was mailed with them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 085

You deserved it 2 506

Today, my dog barked at his own reflection in the mirror for five full minutes. When I tried to calm him down, he started barking at me like I was in on the conspiracy that seemed to be going on in his head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 351

You deserved it 113