Intimacy: Read the room

Read the room

By Anonymous - 16/05/2015 09:11 - United Kingdom - Aberdeen

Today, my boyfriend suddenly stopped in the middle of sex, just as I was actually starting to enjoy myself, just to bear hug me and exclaim, "Crikey, she's angry!" in the voice of Steve Irwin. He laughed so hard at his own joke that he went soft and couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 603

You deserved it 3 707

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Same thing different taste

Honky

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 520

You deserved it 5 248

Orders

By belljars - 18/04/2014 02:27 - United States - Riverside

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and, in the heat of the moment, I cried out for him to go harder. He then had an exasperated expression on his face, and, in an adamantly offended tone, said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he left the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 270

You deserved it 9 167

What ARE you doing?

By Anonymous - 27/09/2014 03:30 - New Zealand

Today, my boyfriend tried to be dominant during sex. It was so out of character for him, I couldn't help but break into hysterical laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 681

You deserved it 12 110

By MulticoloredSlug - 13/10/2016 10:57 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 464

You deserved it 1 428

Bad sign

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 01:28 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 885

You deserved it 6 276

Thunderstruck

By myasshurts - 14/10/2011 23:03 - United States

Today, while lying in bed with my boyfriend after some steamy lovemaking, he sat up, slapped my ass with excruciating force, and screamed, "I AM THE THUNDER!" directly into my ear. It seems our senses of humor differ considerably. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 765

You deserved it 6 673

By Anonymous - 25/10/2014 02:48 - United States - Gainesboro

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. In the heat of the moment, I said his name. He immediately stopped, gave me a deadly serious look and said "Huh? What?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 256

You deserved it 4 943

By Anonymous - 25/06/2015 03:55 - United States - San Francisco

Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 547

You deserved it 5 029

By firsttimer69 - 20/03/2009 06:11 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex. I was a virgin and he wasn't. About 30 seconds in he collapsed on me. I thought he was joking around and I started laughing. He wasn't joking. He was done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151 776

You deserved it 15 201

By Anonymous - 14/04/2014 20:12 - United States - Ellicott City

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 692

You deserved it 8 176

Shipley18 17

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:14

I want to know why Steve Irwin is on his mind during sex

ChocolateScyther 19

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:09

pull a sting ray on him if he tries it again.

Comments

tiggerlover100 27

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:21

Maybe you should just have a talk with him OP on how that probably isn't the sexiest thing to say while having sex.

iiTzNeeNerz 26

Sunday 17 May 2015 8:12

You know, I get that it's sex and some people think it should always be hot and bothered with screams of ecstasy, intense moaning and nothing else filling the room but, while all that is great, at the end of the day, you should be able to laugh with your partner. Yes. Even in the middle of sex.

DoomedGemini 37

Sunday 17 May 2015 10:06

What bothers me is op said she was just starting to enjoy it and the he did this and couldn't finish. Since he decided to make a joke and lose his erection, he should have finished her off in another way. Truthfully, I don't see why he couldn't jokingly talk like that WHILE having sex instead of stopping, but hey still funny.

Googolman 29

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:21

That's a bit depressing, considering he died.

Cads1 24

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:26

Ah man, I made a South Park, Steve Irwin reference and it got removed! Something about thumbs and backsides.

Boren 11

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:28

you have my full permission to sting him. ..

MichelleMaBelle_fml 16

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:43

I'm trying not to laugh right now, sorry man.

shemademedoit 20

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:54

-madea voice- get out of bed or you know what's gonna happen? *whispers* Youre gonna taste the rainbow

crackajak 15

Sunday 17 May 2015 6:56

That's a nice way to cover up the premature release.

thorpe90 8

Sunday 17 May 2015 7:06

Straight savage

rockwrench 18

Sunday 17 May 2015 7:13

Sometimes you have to laugh at some of life's little pleasures.

rydersmomma16 21

Sunday 17 May 2015 7:45

And that's when you tell him to grow up, get out of your house, and then really start evaluating if this guy is actually m mature enough and capable to be able to handle a real relationship.

ChopSuey444 20

Sunday 17 May 2015 11:02

If you have a man who is too serious, you're gonna have a pretty boring life together. I'd rather put up with a few bad jokes than have a partner who doesn't ever try to be silly.