Intimacy Noise annoys

Noise annoys

Steph - 21/06/2009 12:05 - Bulgaria

Today, I realized how much I hate my apartment. Not only can I hear my creepy upstairs neighbor having sex with random hookers every few night, I can also hear him everytime he takes a shit. I honestly don't know which is worse. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Friends theme music plays

Anonymous - 24/06/2020 05:01

Today, I realized that having the apartment bathroom next to my bedroom space isn't so great and convenient when it's occupied by my evil roommate, Fartzilla. I hear every constipated grunt, despite having music turned up. Worse, it's like living next to a poop-pourri factory. Nose bleach, anyone? FML

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STOP!

Anonymous - 28/09/2021 20:00

Today, for the second week in a row, I woke up to the sound of my awful upstairs neighbors having sex between the hours of 1 and 3 AM. Their bed is so noisy, and earplugs barely help. At this point, based on the rhythm of their bed squeaking, I can tell when they're about to finish, and I hate it. FML

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Cursed buildings

investing in earplugs - 23/02/2022 05:59

Today, sick of the unfiltered noise we hear from our neighbours in our upstairs apartment, as we're above their fence line, we signed the lease on an apartment downstairs. While I was downstairs, my partner clomped upstairs, opened the bathroom door, and took a piss. I heard EVERYTHING. FML

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ineedsleep - 30/10/2014 14:15 - Finland - J?rvenp

Today, I found out that there's a very loud and frisky couple living above my bedroom, and a family with a crying baby living above my living room. At this rate, I'll end up sleeping in the bathtub in my own home. FML

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Gentrification strikes!

Anonymous - 05/03/2020 06:01

Today, I actually can't choose what's worse, hearing my direct neighbour having really loud sex on a regular basis, including furniture breaking, or hearing people cheering and playing the piano in the same room. Upper-class fantasy? FML

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Neighbors from hell

Anonymous - 29/05/2023 06:00 - United States - Collegeville

Today, and intermittently ever since I moved in, the guy who lives in the apartment next to me keeps having loud sex with his hookup of the week, while I’m trying to watch TV, eat dinner, etc. I can’t even complain about him to my landlord. Why? The noisy guy is my landlord. FML

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Sort yourselves out

Anonymous - 01/07/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that I bought a house next door to crazy people. She asked me if I would mind not showering when her husband is at home, because he can hear me and knowing I’m naked on the other side of the wall turns him on, which is a nuisance for her. He’s unemployed. He’s always at home, the creep. FML

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The sound of silence

hearing too much - 03/11/2019 02:00

Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML

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holler - 15/09/2011 04:22 - Japan

Today, I had my parents over at my new apartment. As I was telling them how quiet and peaceful my new place is, we could hear my neighbors talking nasty to each other before launching into a full-blown sex ordeal. FML

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op-poopy - 22/04/2011 14:26 - Canada

Today, the landlord of our building constructed a bathroom in the space under the stairs, outside my office, on the other side of a thin wall. He must have some kind of bowel disorder, because now I get to hear the sounds of his loud, wet and gassy pooping several times per day. FML

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purple_riot 0

Sunday 21 June 2009 20:12

What about when the hookers take a shit?

heatherrrx 0

Sunday 21 June 2009 20:09

Move out! Plain and simple. Either that or report him because prostitution is illegal, so maybe he'll get thrown in jail and he won't bother you anymore.

clappy5 0

Monday 22 June 2009 15:57

sofya...really its poor? i thought it was their capital...id expect it to be better off than other parts like..varna or shumen... well...FYL that really sucks personally i think the shit is worse...

Dogmaw 0

Monday 22 June 2009 16:41

Maybe they aren't hookers. Maybe he is such a monster good lay, he can AFFORD to be a noisy pooper.

chickitychina 0

Monday 22 June 2009 17:45

start making annoying noises to him! grossness dude.

1234512345cj 0

Tuesday 23 June 2009 3:33

Wow has to be the shiting that's worse

element01 0

Tuesday 23 June 2009 21:17

Mind Your own business! Quit being all uppity. Everyone takes *****! and If he has the money to bang hookers.. let him! YDI for paying so much attention

avngdsvnfld701 1

Wednesday 24 June 2009 21:00

I bet if you told him you can hear him takin a shit, he'd be embarrassed and move out=) Or hold his shit in until he can crap at his friend's house lol

happygoluckyhh 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 21:27

You have a mouth...use it. Complain to him and the manager.

alibi2277439 0

Sunday 28 June 2009 8:54

1. why are you listening.? 2. grab an i.pod and blast some heavy metal, then it's all good. ;)

ShinyShine 0

Sunday 28 June 2009 11:33

Try living next to him >_> Now you can report him for having lots of women over everynight or you can complain to him that you hear him having sex & taking a dodo.