Sex, Awkward, Cute Intimacy My little buddy - FML

My little buddy

Anonymous - 18/08/2009 05:37 - United States

Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML

80 152

6 521

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

chewybarseventy - 24/08/2010 06:17 - United States

Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML

34 531

11 084

Buzzing the tower

Princess ? - 12/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML

2 200

296

left out wet - 22/06/2019 22:08

Today, I was laying in bed completely naked, uncovered and waiting for my husband to walk in. He laid down in bed and starting playing with his phone instead of. FML

1 772

257

Anonymous - 30/01/2015 20:16 - United States

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

42 272

4 515

Surprised indeed

fredo - 19/03/2013 12:31 - United States - Ames

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

54 097

24 137

Honey, I'm home!

Anonymous - 26/11/2025 20:00

Today, I got home and found my husband, naked with an erection and my panties on his face like a mask. He claimed to be the Panty Bandit there to plunder my booty. I might have indulged his insanity and had sex with him were my mom and dad not right behind me in the doorway. FML

325

86

Hunterxx - 07/08/2010 05:21 - United States

Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML

39 785

7 240

Classic Dave

Sarahir - 29/04/2020 05:00

Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML

2 231

411

Anonymous - 13/03/2010 09:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

31 804

10 111

Meh

Meh - 18/07/2009 15:51 - United States

Today, I tried to surprise my husband because our sex life is lacking. We have planned sex Tuesday night, every week, with the lights off. When he came home for lunch, I was naked and waiting for him. He took one look and said, "I forgot you looked like that. Meh, I'm going back to work." FML

77 191

8 560

Violet_Illuser 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 17:21

I'm sorry, I'm not seeing how this is "ew." I'm laughing too damn hard.

DameGreyWulf 0

Tuesday 18 August 2009 20:11

Hello there, Richard. We hear you're going to go spend the night your girlfriend, miss Pusé. Is that true? Oh, how scandalous~!

julien672 0

Sunday 13 June 2010 18:05

#59 made my life xD but sorry for your OP :( that sucks ass Dx

suckmineplz 0

Tuesday 13 July 2010 4:05

in Soviet Russia, the penis draws a face on you

osirisfrost 0

Wednesday 11 August 2010 8:28

he's awesome

Rhyno1996 0

Tuesday 26 October 2010 11:40

that guy is awesome

iPunchedBigFoot 5

Sunday 21 November 2010 21:09

So did you give his "friend" a warm place to "sleep"

dmanning1993 4

Friday 1 April 2011 5:35

epic

biwinning88 1

Saturday 9 April 2011 14:25

what a keeper

traciblack 0

Monday 23 May 2011 16:25

Hahaha

Giggity4451 0

Monday 1 August 2011 1:11

60,000 to agree her life sucked.

edgez 0

Tuesday 2 August 2011 5:26

Great social life.

8
9
10
11
12
13

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I placed a Bible app next to an app I use for porn, in the hope that it will encourage me to watch less porn. I'm a girl. FML

54 724

27 417

Today, during my Zoom PTM my teacher screen-shared his Chrome tab, in which he had opened porn instead of the presentation he had to open, and now mom wants to change my school, where I've been studying in for past 10 years. FML

1 020

143

Today, I was catching the bus to my new job. While waiting at the lights, I decided to play the staring game and ended up staring at a woman in the car next to the bus for ages, really creeping her out. It turns out she's my new boss. FML

12 624

49 959

Today, I had a job interview at a café. The interviewer asked me my availability and I told her that I was fully flexible. She laughed and said, "Really? That's tragic." FML

29 312

2 745

Today, I'm a youth worker. I drove 7 hours to visit a teenage girl I have been working with, and who recently moved. Due to roadworks, it took me 2 hours longer than expected. When I arrived, she told me to fuck off and closed the door in my face. FML

5 189

551

Today, and for the past year, I’ve been losing a custody battle with my ex, I got put on medication that makes me feel dead, and I just found out my current boyfriend, who I’ve been dating for 3 years, has been cheating for months with girls I told him I didn’t have a good feeling about. FML

547

138