Intimacy Imitation

Imitation

Anonymous - 20/06/2009 16:06 - United States

Today, my husband and I were having sex in the shower while our 5-year old was sleeping. Apparently, she wasn't sleeping and she asked me what those loud noises were. I told her I was singing. Now I can't get her to stop "singing" in the shower. FML

21 080

61 659

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Anonymous user - 09/08/2018 06:00

Today, my mom laughed about hearing me singing in the shower and told our whole family. I wasn't singing, though. I was masturbating. FML

2 065

2 980

deargodthepain - 02/02/2014 16:53 - United States

Today, I was singing in the shower but couldn't hit the higher notes. My wife complained and 2 minutes later she ran a tap causing my shower to go freezing. I shrieked. My wife said my pitch was still wrong. FML

44 303

8 878

Stop that now

Soo - 24/12/2020 08:04 - Spain - Archidona

Today, I saw my 4 year-old daughter singing and dancing, so I decided to sing along. As soon as I started singing she said, without blinking her eyes and super calmly, "Could you please stop doing that?" FML

775

277

Wanker!

EmbarrassedBather - 09/06/2019 00:00

Today, while I was showering, someone left a note on the bathroom door that read, "We can all hear you masturbating. Shut the hell up." I don't know what's more embarrassing, that everyone in my house thought I was masturbating or that I was actually singing. FML

2 090

391

Scarred for life

Guess who's back - 10/07/2022 10:00 - Australia - Homebush

Today, in the morning, my wife and I were having hot but silent sex on my futon while our 3 year-old slept in his crib. It was going great until my turn to come when I released a loud, "AARRGHHHHHH". My son promptly got up, took one look at me and his mother's back, then promptly went back to sleep without a word. FML

464

1 914

Anonymous - 19/11/2010 07:47

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML

42 370

13 774

Anonymous - 13/07/2014 17:54 - Canada - Tatamagouche

Today, I was singing in the shower, not realising the window was open. When I got out, the neighbours were at the front door, loudly arguing with my mother. They were complaining about my awful singing. FML

41 968

7 039

Keep it down

Anonymous - 06/02/2011 05:10 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I reached climax. While I was screaming, my 4 year-old son came in with his water gun because he thought I was in trouble. FML

18 197

59 948

No more yodelling

Anonymous - 05/03/2023 00:00

Today, I was singing in the shower and my neighbor called the police because they thought I was in trouble. FML

1 092

239

Oh mother, I can feel, the soiiiiil falling over my heaaaaaaad

Anonymous - 24/10/2009 10:27 - United States

Today, I was informed by my next door neighbor that they heard me singing in the shower last night. I laughed and she told me that the family gathers in their upstairs room closest to my bathroom window to guess which song I'm singing. Every night. FML

35 628

6 610

purplestuff_fml 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 20:03

Ugh. I don't get why you can't just hold in your moan. Atleast take it out with breathing.. ******* hate when my mom screams for ages. Yeah, I'm a sick little bastard, I know.

PositiveChillout 0

Saturday 20 June 2009 20:05

Just make sure she doesn't shower when you're having company over!!

naja_12168 3

Tuesday 23 June 2009 5:07

Oh, and Vanita? Considering a child can enter puberty as early as eight, waiting until puberty to teach a child about sex to the degree you're suggesting is NOT a bad thing.

amazingkate 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 1:28

it's not that parents shouldn't have sex, and it's not that kids shouldn't know about sex, it's just that parents shouldn't have loud sex. if i've learned anything from these FMLs.

inkiepie 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 3:10

try to be more careful nextime.

Teddyburr 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 4:11

Sex in the shsower is amazeing! :)

senorita_z 0

Wednesday 24 June 2009 6:04

But you can explain puberty and such before the child reaches that age without having to go in to detail. Even if they are "mature enough" to handle such talk, there is no need to tell a five year old about sex.