Miscellaneous: Can't take it anymore

Can't take it anymore

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 085

You deserved it 6 607

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Same thing different taste

By DonPedro - 16/01/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 877

You deserved it 11 410

By loveloves154 - 30/03/2018 15:00

Today, our toilet overflowed during the night. Over 50 gallons worth leaked through the floor and the ceiling to the room below. I am now covered in poop water. What a way to start the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 983

You deserved it 275

By Ferniferousfern - 20/08/2018 18:30

Today, I sat down to use the bathroom after a long day of work. My toilet, however, had other plans, as a spontaneous, ear shattering crack flooded the entire bathroom, soaking the outer carpet and shorting out my bathroom scale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 966

You deserved it 157

Shit show

By Malakai - 23/10/2018 22:00

Today, after taking a massive shit, I flushed the toilet and it clogged. It flooded to the brim and the shit came rising to the top. I didn't know what to do so I grabbed some toilet paper and picked it up, ran to my balcony, and launched it. It landed on my neighbor's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 273

You deserved it 3 747

By TheKingDavis - 14/02/2011 07:11 - United States

Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 123

You deserved it 3 200

By Woody - 06/10/2018 14:00 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I went to take a dump at work, but the last person in the stall didn't flush. As I flushed for him, the shitty water splashed on my face. Some went in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 717

You deserved it 404

Best seat in the house

By Rachey - 10/09/2024 00:00 - Ireland

Today, I was using the toilet at a friend's house when the toilet made a strange gurgling noise. Thinking it was just old plumbing, I flushed. The water started rising... and rising. Before I knew it, water, and whatever was in the toilet, began overflowing and flooding the bathroom. I had to go ask for help, and a mop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 460

You deserved it 128

By Anonymous - 05/02/2015 15:32 - United States - Glen Allen

Today, I walked into my bathroom, only to find no toilet paper and a piece of shitty wallpaper in the bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 438

You deserved it 2 797

By Anonymous - 06/04/2017 18:00

Today, I had to stop on a long trip to use the restroom at a gas station. Apparently, there was water damage beneath the toilet, because after about two minutes of doing my business, it collapsed about seven inches beneath the floor. Guess who got covered in water, black mold, and poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 951

You deserved it 403

HELP!

By SeatofIgnorance - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 763

You deserved it 5 464

cymruambyth 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 23:48

well it does have a crappy job

jbird1193 3

Sunday 22 May 2011 23:55

finally, a comedian posts something on this site

Comments

xXDubbleChic 11

Monday 23 May 2011 3:45

punny

Emmy_The_Great 2

Monday 23 May 2011 3:53

The wording of this is such a win!

nixibeast 0

Monday 23 May 2011 4:16

nice pun :D

Loaffer 2

Monday 23 May 2011 4:20

Haha I see what you did there :P I know Shitty response XP

FlyingLazerWALRU 0

Monday 23 May 2011 4:28

So many puns...

imOaks 3

Monday 23 May 2011 4:45

These dookie puns are a bit cliché.

atomicbaboon 0

Monday 23 May 2011 7:42

and pretty shitty.

proxxX069069 7

Monday 23 May 2011 4:45

ohh jeez.

Addy414 12

Monday 23 May 2011 4:56

BWHAHAHAHA

fmart 0

Monday 23 May 2011 5:01

if u justlol whyd u write lmao? is that an oxymoron?

Fr3nChii 0

Monday 23 May 2011 5:20

this made me laugh sooo hard!!!!

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, for his birthday, I bought my son the Xbox game he wanted. Seven hours for the game to install, two hours to download, then install an update, which failed twice and had to be restarted. He was a nightmare all afternoon waiting for it, then it was bedtime and the game still wasn’t ready. FML

I agree, your life sucks 473

You deserved it 151

Today, I sent a text message to a guy I like, saying, "Dear Santa, I want to fall in love." He replied: "Wait for next Christmas..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 360

You deserved it 11 124

Today, two of my cousins sat me down and said they wanted to give me an early birthday present. With straight faces, they looked at me and said: "We signed you up for eHarmony, and paid for 12 months." Not only do my cousins think I need help finding a boyfriend, but they think it'll take a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 364

You deserved it 5 813

Today, I went on a date with a guy I've been talking to. We ended up at his house around 4 a.m., but as we walked through the front door, his ex-girlfriend was sitting on the couch, apparently waiting for him to get home. They still live together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 149

You deserved it 1 102

Today, I met my paternal grandparents for the first time, since my dad was never in my life and my mom wouldn’t talk about him. According to them, I have at least 28 other siblings from him, and who knows how many that haven’t come forward. No wonder my mom always hated him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 036

You deserved it 139

Today, was my sister's and dad's birthday. I accidentally mixed up the gifts I got for them and my dad ended up with a vibrator. He wasn't very happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 021

You deserved it 64 070