Intimacy: Today, my dad got a hard-on looking at my best friend. He asked...

By Anonymous - 10/02/2010 12:23 - United States

Today, my dad got a hard-on looking at my best friend. He asked me how my NutriSystem diet was going. He was looking at my friend's boobs when he asked me. FML

agreeclassic 25 121

vote type 1 2 513

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Today, the guy I've had a crush on came over to my house. My Dad came in to see how we we're doing, looks at me and says "Man... You've REALLY been puttin' on the pounds!", pokes me in the stomach a few times, and leaves. FML

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By oshitdonotwant - 08/08/2009 13:42 - United States

Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

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By madisonnkelly - 06/07/2015 03:18 - United States - Dallas

Today, I was laying in bed facing my dad. In the middle of our conversation, I noticed he became interested in something behind me. I turn around to the sight of my mom lifting up her shirt, flashing her boobs. FML

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By The fat and the ugly - 27/10/2011 18:56 - Finland

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By florisvanlent - 12/02/2009 16:17 - Netherlands

Today, while copying some stuff for school, I felt someone rubbing her boobs against my back. I got a boner and when I looked to see who the hot chick was, I saw my fat friend rubbing his man boobs against my back. FML

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By Female_Lucifer - 20/10/2013 13:02 - United States - New Lebanon

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

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By Anonymous - 01/06/2012 20:46 - Greece - Athens

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "Recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

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By peaaaak - 03/06/2011 10:17 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad came round to the house. Looking rather pleased with himself he pulled out his phone, grinned, and chucked it over to me. I glanced at the screen to see a naked woman. He smiled and said "I tapped that last night". FML

agreeclassic 49 239

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whiffleball 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 19:55

how do you know he got a hard on? are you checking out your dad's junk?

whitesoxsean 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 19:54

ur dads a pedo

Comments

Emofluffinzhehe 0

Friday 12 February 2010 7:07

nice hair =v^,^v=

GiggityGiggityGo_fml 8

Friday 12 February 2010 17:46

love #119 completly agree. also HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA

justanotherhuman 21

Sunday 14 February 2010 10:19

Dear OP, Disregard the folks who wonder how/why you knew that your father was aroused- clearly amateurs. I can sniff out if someone is attracted to another person within 50 feet of our location. This -very much- sucks being around my parents, who are -very much- in love... but I digress. Mommy being whorish and daddy being sleazy, are both equal on the 'holy-sh!t-that's-creepy-meter'. Need to confront your father on how to behave within a parameter *you* define as appropriate around *your* guests.