Health: Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up...

By anonymous - 12/03/2012 08:03 - United States

Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML

agreeclassic 9 686

vote type 1 27 522

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By Anonymous - 29/01/2012 05:50 - United States

Today, I was cleaning my room and set my burnt out light bulb on my computer chair without any second thought. Later, I sat on the chair, the light bulb shattered and I got a huge gash on my butt. FML

agreeclassic 11 680

vote type 1 30 923

Baked

By Monty - 01/03/2009 08:45 - United States

Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven, I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was only wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and, um… stuff. FML

agreeclassic 89 537

vote type 1 15 624

Third degree

By Anonymous - 10/07/2021 06:01

Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML

agreeclassic 1 508

vote type 1 145

Pucker up

By It feels fucking awful - 18/12/2025 12:00

Today, on a whim, I decided to try to light a fart on fire. I now know how it feels to take a dump when you have a burn directly on your asshole. FML

agreeclassic 47

vote type 1 543

By foolmetwice - 16/05/2011 14:28

Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML

agreeclassic 22 105

vote type 1 40 120

By SpontaneousAM - 15/04/2017 14:00 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, while moving my wax burner away from the window, I spilled hot wax all over my hands, the wall, and in my electric fireplace. FML

agreeclassic 4 116

vote type 1 1 195

By thatchick3333 - 08/03/2012 07:13 - United States

Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML

agreeclassic 24 495

vote type 1 6 973

Headshot

By home owner - 20/08/2010 06:14 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower for the first time in my new apartment. The shower head broke off the wall and slammed onto my head, while spraying water everywhere. I tried to stop the water, but only stopped the cold and got burnt by the hot. FML

agreeclassic 32 768

vote type 1 3 367

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 05:44 - United States

Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML

agreeclassic 8 222

vote type 1 52 419

By teflon_hammer - 25/05/2016 23:19 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, I was taking a shower, facing away from the faucet, when I dropped the soap. When I bent over to pick up the soap, my sister flushed a toilet in the next room, causing hot water to scorch my anus. I got made my shower's bitch, FML

agreeclassic 11 936

vote type 1 1 207

biggestfan23 11

Monday 12 March 2012 15:40

I like burned butts and I cannot lie!

sqeakyclean 7

Monday 12 March 2012 15:51

What's the matter with you?

Comments

friisen_ 0

Monday 12 March 2012 17:13

So you took a bath to re-heat? O_o

naduskalove 3

Monday 12 March 2012 17:29

Ass on fire , ouch !

jaredofmo 22

Monday 12 March 2012 17:37

Are you Popeye the sailor man? Do you live in a garbage can? Because when you turn on the heater, It sure burns your seater.

fmlahahaha 5

Monday 12 March 2012 17:47

Maybe you should consider buying a heated towel rack?? Lol

x_Just_Ellie_x 8

Monday 12 March 2012 17:50

Pics or it didn't happen.

prettyboodoll33 2

Monday 12 March 2012 17:57

I've done that.!!!

ninjduck 0

Monday 12 March 2012 18:04

Haha smart one

skullcandifiedDJ 5

Monday 12 March 2012 18:12

OHHhh you got BURNED. Sigh* I seriously need to get better jokes...

navychick2 10

Monday 12 March 2012 18:20

Ive done that when i was younger.

Pandacupcakelove 26

Monday 12 March 2012 18:27

Whyyy? -.-

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Today, there were some wasps getting in my bedroom from a hole in the frame of my window. I went outside with some spray and took out their entrance. What I didnt know is that when you spray wasps, they go the other direction. I now have 60+ wasps flying around my bedroom. FML

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vote type 1 26 005

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