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Unrequited

By SilentAF - 10/04/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I was working up the courage to tell my male bestie of three years that I was starting to fall in love with him. I told him, “Hey, I wanna get something off my chest, do you mind?” He instantly panicked and said, “Nope, please don’t say it.” and asked me to leave. He never let me speak and changed the subject. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 126

Desperate

By Anonymous - 14/03/2026 12:00

Today, my ex-wife announced that she's taking me to court for child support. Her kids were just my stepkids and we weren't even married a year, but she apparently has a pretty good lawyer on her side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 516

You deserved it 78

Snob

By Anonymous - 18/03/2026 00:00

Today, I overheard my boyfriend refer to me as a “pretty but dumb chick” because I like horror movies and comedies over his boring pseudo intellectual dramas. I literally have two degrees and I'm working on a third, while he has neither, yet he thinks he’s smarter than me because of movies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 527

You deserved it 143

Waste not, want not

By Anonymous - 21/03/2026 15:00

Today, my boyfriend sent me a long text breaking up with me and calling me "selfish", all because I fed my dog half of the roast he made us for dinner. He knows damn well I feed her a raw diet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75

You deserved it 832

Bide your time

By Anonymous - 23/03/2026 09:00

Today, I'm being forced to go back to my parents', who kicked me out because they thought I was gay. I'm not. There was a misunderstanding. I don't want to go back to them because they've shown me what kind of people they are, even if I'm straight, but the police and Social Services are making me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 490

You deserved it 106

No smoke, no fire

By Anonymous - 25/03/2026 03:00

Today, a misunderstanding led to me falsely accusing my husband of cheating. We cleared it up and he forgave me and everything, but my parents are still convinced that he cheated, and won't believe me when I say he wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 506

Great start to the day

By Anonymous - 30/03/2026 12:00

Today, right before a job interview, I spilled hot coffee all over my lap. The stain looked incredibly suspicious. During the interview, the recruiter kept glancing down awkwardly while I tried to maintain eye contact and confidence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 306

You deserved it 72

Mixed signals

By Anonymous - 12/04/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I introduced my dad to my boyfriend. I gave my dad the middle finger and he thumped me on the head, as we've been playfully doing for years. My boyfriend got all mad and tried to fight my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 162

Small town

By Anonymous - 13/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I finally left New York and moved back to my little hometown, only for the job I had lined up to fall through. Now I'm unemployed, can't find anything, and my parents aren't willing to help because they're angry that I "walked out on the family." FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 17

Madcap plans

By Anonymous - 14/03/2026 15:00

Today, my wife inherited her grandparents' farm in Hawaii and she is now dead-set on uprooting our kids and everything, and moving the family there. I keep telling her that just isn't feasible or financially possible, but she won't take no for an answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 109

We're open

By Milos Maricic - 16/03/2026 09:00

Today, after six months of building my SaaS (Software as a service) every night after work while juggling life with three kids, I finally launched it. Two months later, it’s still getting almost zero traffic. Turns out building the product was the easy part… getting people to actually visit it is the real nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 345

You deserved it 124

Hang tight

By I’m absolutely terrified!!!!! - 18/03/2026 03:00

Today, I was told I may have ALS. This all started only 3 weeks ago when I saw a speech pathologist for what was supposed to be a super simple, easy to fix issue. I’m now having panic attacks multiple times a day while waiting to see a neurologist to see if I’ll turn into a dumb Stephen Hawking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 86

BPD

By The 3 C's of BPD - 19/03/2026 22:00

Today, my boyfriend is blaming me for his recent diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder. Apparently, I should have just kept on tolerating all of his explosive outbursts, instead of "forcing" him to start couples' therapy with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 74

The soothsayer

By mustanggt - 23/03/2026 12:00

Today, we had a field trip to the local theme park. As I explained the safety rules, one of the students piped up with, "Yeah, I'm ditching you. Y'all are going to be the ones puking your guts up all over the place." He was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 98

RIP Travis

By Fucking shithead asshole - 30/03/2026 15:00

Today, I came home to my daughter in her room, crying hysterically. She's been asking for a pet monkey for a few weeks, and my husband got tired of it and told her about Travis the Chimpanzee (don't look it up if you're squeamish). Thanks for ruining her innocence, prick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 380

Kinda based

By Anonymous - 01/04/2026 09:00

Today, a woman accused my husband of being a pedophile because he was at the playground with our daughter alone. To make matters worse, our daughter punched the woman in the face, so now she's pressing charges. FML

I agree, your life sucks 488

You deserved it 66

Chocolate rain

By Anonymous - 03/04/2026 03:00

Today, I'm in the hospital getting prepped for a colonoscopy. Accidents happen, but the worst was right after the janitor finished cleaning the aftermath of the LAST accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 82

Doctor Google

By Anonymous - 05/04/2026 00:00

Today, my mother-in-law 'corrected' me while I was trying to help her father with his Parkinson's medication. She went on and on about how she read on the internet about it. I'm a neurologist, but no, she knows better after a Google search. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 77

Blackout

By Anonymous - 06/04/2026 11:00 - United States - Phoenix

Today, my wife doesn't remember that last night when she was so drunk (light weight) that she kept telling me to pick up the thingy off the floor and was pointing at it. We went back and forth about it for a few minutes. There was nothing there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 92

Training wheels

By Pizza? - 08/04/2026 15:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I’m learning to cook and invited friends over to prove I’m improving. I timed everything perfectly… or so I thought. I realized I’d never actually turned the oven on. We stood around a beautifully plated tray of room-temperature lasagna while I said, “It just needs… a bit more time.” Two hours later, we ordered pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 159

You deserved it 352

Put it in park

By Anonymous - 10/04/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I’m learning to drive and finally felt confident enough to park in a tight spot with my instructor watching. I nailed the angle perfectly, but when I tried to get out, I realized I'd parked so close to the line that I couldn’t open the door. I had to climb out of the passenger side while my instructor pretended not to laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 260

You deserved it 94

Bang bang bank

By Freerickson - 12/04/2026 06:00 - United States

Today, I learned that you should never take a girl you meet at the club home, even if she looks like she wouldn’t hurt a fly. We had the most amazing sex ever and I guess the edibles we had threw me off-guard. I woke up to find her gone and my house cleaned out. I didn’t even get her name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 185

New BFF unlocked

By Anna - 16/03/2026 12:00

Today, it's been three years that I've worked as a waitress at a fine local restaurant. I like the work and it felt special when a regular customer, with my permission, hugged and complimented me, and said, "I appreciate you, 'Anna the Cool'. Thanks for helping to make this my fave restaurant." If only my friends were this nice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 349

You deserved it 93

Healthcare is broken

By kimraye20 - 20/03/2026 00:00

Today, I've found out I developed carpal tunnel in my right hand and need surgery. On top of that I have degenerative arthritis in my left hip, which needs immediate surgery as well. I haven’t met my $5,000 insurance deductible and have to pay out of pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 74

Craving taste

By Anonymous - 23/03/2026 15:00

Today, my husband caught me sneaking out of his parents' house to get food. I love my in-laws, they’re the type of people others dream of having, but the food is so horrible. I don’t understand how in such a large family of amazing people not one of them has figured out how to make a decent meal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 95

Been there, done that

By Anonymous - 01/04/2026 12:00

Today, my parents told me that they don't respect my decision to stay single for the rest of my life and never date again, and have made it clear they will continue pressuring me to find someone new. I'm only 27 and I've already been both widowed and divorced. I'm done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 109

Give peace a chance

By Anonymous - 05/04/2026 03:00

Today, I found out that my mom withdrew me from karate at the insistence of my my fucking stepdad, who's a wimpy sissy pacifist who is against violence. I was so close to getting my black belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 82

My body, my choice

By Anonymous - 06/04/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my parents are sending me to boot camp. All because I drove my sister to her abortion when they wouldn't. Not even she can stop them from doing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 562

You deserved it 139

Neighborhood watch

By Anonymous - 12/04/2026 09:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, we have a man prowling the neighborhood, soliciting donations to a fake charity, all while he is casing the neighborhood and asking us about our valuables. The cops refuse to do anything about it, except tell us we will probably get robbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 332

You deserved it 68

Time for an intervention

By Sad mija - 18/03/2026 09:00

Today, my dad wrecked yet another car by driving drunk. He's now in jail and has a broken arm. I've begged my family to help him get sober, but they just say, "Stop your americanized bullshit, he's fine, this is how we do in the old country." I'm scared he's gonna get someone killed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 51

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The Top

Today, I got an A+ on a writing assignment. My teacher asked me three times if I really did write this article myself, and didn't memorise an article from the Internet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 527

You deserved it 132

Today, I accidentally dropped my cigarette down my shirt. There are now two unsightly, painful burns right in the center of my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 018

You deserved it 72 239

Today, I learned to never invite my father to a wedding. He'll show up late, complain about the food, piss on a tree, and leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 700

You deserved it 3 054

Today, I went to the movies on a date. I went to pay for the tickets when I realized that I didn't have my wallet. Instead of my boyfriend paying, he laughed and paid for his own ticket. Then he went ahead and saw the movie without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 388

You deserved it 7 552

Today, I finished taking a huge dump at the public restroom at the mall. When I got up to wipe, my wrist clipped my butt and knocked my brand new Apple Watch into the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 140

You deserved it 1 230

Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 719

You deserved it 18 316