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Well I've been out of high school for over a year now and my other sister (who knew for some reason) let it slip while we were discussing valentines day. I played it off like I already knew, but I secretly died a little inside.

By mee - 08/09/2012 22:39 - United States

Today, I discovered a large and somewhat disturbing whitehead inside my ear crevice. Apparently it's been there for a while, because everyone at work has nicknamed it Hugo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 999

You deserved it 3 073

By Jennyfromdablock - 31/12/2009 03:28 - United States

Today, I was making out with a really hot guy in a Jacuzzi. He had the biggest booger hanging out of his nostril, but I was too embarrassed to say anything to him about it. He went in for a kiss. Soon after our lips parted, he said, "Oh, you have big booger." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 916

You deserved it 36 358

By OMFG I LOVE MLP - 24/08/2012 21:00 - Germany - Mainz

Today, my friends set me up on a blind date. I thought it went well, and while saying our goodbyes, I leaned in to give her a kiss. She pulled way, laughed, "I'm not drunk enough for that," and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 973

You deserved it 3 802

By fml_seriouslyfml - 07/06/2009 01:11 - United States

Today, I left my wallet on top of my car when I filled up with gas. I drove away and didn't realize it until I got home. I went back and found it on the side of the road. Empty of my credit cards, pictures and checks. All that was left was my driver's license. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 606

You deserved it 43 456

By ouch - 12/12/2009 20:36 - United States

Today, I finally finished vacuuming my downstairs. Instead of finding the wall outlet and unplugging the vacuum, I triumphantly tugged the cord from across the room to release the plug from the wall. It flew at me at top speed and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 947

You deserved it 41 981

By stupidboys - 06/09/2011 16:42 - United States

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend after helping him study for his ACT, giving him a back rub, and having really awesome sex with him. His reason for dumping me? He's too stressed out to have a girlfriend right now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 810

You deserved it 4 638

By heshay - 28/10/2010 04:27 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was seated in my section at work. As he sees me his face drops... he's on a date. He had forgotten I work there. I had to serve him and his date, and they didn't leave a tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 788

You deserved it 3 552

By isellorangez - 09/10/2015 18:27 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I got banned from a suicide prevention forum for "attention seeking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 910

You deserved it 3 576

isellorangez tells us more.

isellorangez 20

Saturday 10 October 2015 18:45

Hey, I'm the op and this is my first fml so I hope I'm doing this right. I thought I should say a few things based on some of the comments I read. No, I was not just being an asshat to everyone, I just posted a thread explaining myself and such. Shortly after I posted it I got banned for "attention seeking" and that's all the information I was given. Oh and all the people saying "******* emo" and such, I guess I look like the stereotypical emo, but seriously you could be a bit more mature about things.

By swiggityswooty - 23/07/2014 04:09 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I got the, "It's not you, it's me" speech for the third breakup in a row. I'm beginning to think that they may not be entirely telling me the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 066

You deserved it 7 369

Tanning

By Anonymous - 13/07/2014 04:08 - United States

Today, I decided to tan naked in a secluded part of my yard, so I wouldn't get tan lines. I even felt adventurous enough to leave my bikini and towel inside. This idea backfired however when my mom stopped home from work, assumed I wasn't home, and locked all the doors before she left again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 702

You deserved it 15 779

By Chubby - 02/11/2009 20:39 - Belgium

Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 584

You deserved it 5 544

By msyaz - 15/09/2010 09:45 - Australia

Today, I turned up 5 minutes late to what would have been a 5 minute breast check. After waiting for ages, a nurse asked me what I was doing there. Turns out because I was late, they had put me in the no-show pile, but forgot to tell me when I checked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 545

You deserved it 8 734

msyaz tells us more.

msyaz 0

Saturday 18 September 2010 11:22

To everyone who commented on this FML...I was the one who posted it. Given that I only had 300 characters to write my FML, didn't really get to explain it properly and the way it is worded does make it sound like my fault. Basically, the whole story goes like this. I left 40 mins early for the appointment that was only maximum 20 mins away from my house. I looked up parking costs on the hospitals website before, and it said it would cost me $4 max for any amount of time. I got there, only to find that parking was actually $7, which I didn't have on me. I had to find a free park, which ended up being about a 10 mins walk up the street. Hence, I was late. Then when I got there, I explained what had happened, asked them if I was still on the list and they said yes, it was all fine and that the wait was usually long. Hence, I didn't think anything of it when I was waiting for quite a while. So yes, I should have been on time, but techinically the rest was not my fault. Thanks for all the comments though :)

By ohmydog - 05/09/2010 08:14 - United States

Today, I found out that the reason why my boyfriend has a chipped tooth is because his teeth hit another girl's teeth while kissing her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 949

You deserved it 3 654