Sex, Wanker Intimacy WTF dude? - FML

WTF dude?

lunarstrain - 08/11/2011 06:11 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to have sex with a piece of fruit. FML

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Anonymous - 26/12/2011 00:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to put his penis in a hole in our bedroom wall. FML

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Juiced - 26/09/2012 18:46 - United States - Denver

Today, my boyfriend excitedly showed me his new juicer, and used up all the fruit in the house making new concoctions. It was adorable until later on, in the middle of getting frisky, he asked if we could go to the grocery store to buy more fruit. FML

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That's that, then

Anonymous - 12/09/2020 08:02

Today, I walked in on my brother having sex. With my boyfriend. FML

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Anonymous - 15/02/2014 22:44 - United States - Carlisle

Today, I told my husband how frisky I was feeling, and asked him what he was going to do about it. He reached into our fruit bowl, tossed me a banana and told me to work it out, then returned to his video game. FML

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What the…

bunny - 16/08/2009 13:58 - United States

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend humping my stuffed rabbit. I thought he was trying to be funny until I saw that he had an erection. FML

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Kyra.45 - 03/10/2013 22:46 - United States - Troy

Today, I was so sexually frustrated that I tried getting off with a banana. It was not enjoyable, for me or the banana. FML

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Patricia - 01/10/2011 23:30 - United States

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home, he was masturbating. FML

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Hard to believe

- 02/01/2020 18:00

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML

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jessica - 02/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

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GoldenTornado11 - 10/05/2017 14:00

Today, I walked in on my parents having sex. In my room. FML

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alexm501 0

Tuesday 8 November 2011 12:05

Hopefully it wasn't a banana

KennKenn 0

Tuesday 8 November 2011 12:04

At least it wasn't apple pie.

rocketgirl999 2

Wednesday 9 November 2011 13:12

banana :-D lol hes gay. dump him

shazza26 1

Wednesday 9 November 2011 13:43

Was it a grapefruit ;)

hibbitsra 1

Wednesday 9 November 2011 14:01

Well did u help him out (:

neverletup21 2

Wednesday 9 November 2011 14:21

Oooo!!!! (:O wa....wat the fawk!?!?why!?!?!?hahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahaha THTS FUNNY!!!!reminds me of the noodle song when the guys fuking the bowl of noodles lmao XD

LilToonchiii 0

Wednesday 9 November 2011 14:31

Orange you glad it wasn't another woman?

Spanky86 0

Wednesday 9 November 2011 15:32

Maybe he wouldn't jack off with fruit of you had sex with him more often

johnnyexpl0sion 0

Wednesday 9 November 2011 15:34

Doesn't matter, had sex.

AntiHero1317 8

Wednesday 9 November 2011 16:59

That right there is Thanksgiving dinner material.

htb2050 11

Wednesday 9 November 2011 18:50

It must have been a banana. Theres a video on YouTube showin how to convert a banana to fleshlite.

Epic_Times 10

Wednesday 9 November 2011 19:43

Was it a banana or

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I tried to surprise my boyfriend by jumping on his back for a piggyback ride. He wasn’t expecting it. We both ended up on the floor, and I owe him a new pair of glasses. FML

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Today, my mom scolded me for not taking driving lessons already. This comes a few days after she told me that, "Allowing teenagers to drive is just another way of thinning out the gene pool". FML

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Today, I was chased on my bike by a couple of guys in a car. I rode into a public park to cut through and try to lose them. I looked by to check if they were following me, but they had to stop. I laughed, looked forward, and rammed into a little girl. FML

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Today, I had my girlfriend over and we were watching a movie in my basement. I ran upstairs and popped a bag of popcorn. Later I came downstairs to find my 10 year-old brother sitting next to my girlfriend, saying, "My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means." FML

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Today, it's been 5 good months since I reconnected with a guy I've known since elementary. I have him on every social, he called me pretty, etc. We weren't ever together but he acted like my boyfriend. He stopped talking for a month, with messages every now and then, and now he has a girlfriend and doesn't talk to me. FML

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Today, I got into bed as my cat crept under it. I then heard him gagging, so I instantly got back up to get him out, because my floor is carpeted. As I pulled him into the hall, he flew upwards, made a horrific "Blagh!" sound, projectile vomited everywhere, then hit the wall and ran. FML

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