"Who wants a dessert?" By Lewis - 27/12/2018 00:30 - France - Paris I made a huge mistake... I agree, your life sucks 296 You deserved it 89 Share Tweet Share
Today, tired of people letting their dogs crap in my yard, I sprinkled an assortment of crushed peppers around my lawn as a deterrent. One dog went to do its business and had some sort of allergic reaction. Now its bitchy owner is threatening to sue me, and tried to have her daughter kick my ass. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 041 You deserved it 422
Today, I came back home from a holiday with family. Finally being on my own, I did some catching up on my masturbation. I have jerked off so much and/or so vigorously, I now have a carpet burn on my penis. FML I agree, your life sucks 322 You deserved it 1 704
Today, I accidentally sliced open my crush's hand at work while we were messing around on break. A month ago, I broke his brother's finger playing dodgeball. No wonder I'm still single; he must think I'm out to get his family. FML I agree, your life sucks 10 128 You deserved it 1 344
Today, a police officer pulled me over while I was riding my high performance motorbike. He asked if I knew why he'd pulled me over. It was too tempting to resist at the time, but in hindsight telling him ,“Because I let you?” was not the best idea I’ve ever had. Cops have no sense of humour. FML I agree, your life sucks 145 You deserved it 829
Today, I discovered an enormous hairy spider sitting in the bathtub. I also discovered that I scream like a girl and pee a little bit when I am truly terrified. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 458 You deserved it 12 644
Today, I caught my wife slipping penis enlargement pills into my coffee. FML I agree, your life sucks 51 397 You deserved it 8 822
you dessert it! :)
Soooo cute