Videos When I try to quit junk food - FML

When I try to quit junk food

Lewis - 08/12/2018 18:00

I'm not a quitter!

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Charlie Given 26

Sunday 9 December 2018 2:56

Yup that's me when there is white chocolate in the house 😋

Charlie Given 26

Sunday 9 December 2018 2:56

Yup that's me when there is white chocolate in the house 😋

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I started playing softball again in a league after not playing for about 5 years. My very first time at the bat I whacked a foul ball into the parking lot and hit my own car. FML

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Today, after a 7-year dry spell, I finally got laid. The downside? It was in my dreams and involved a character from My Little Pony forcing itself on me. Now I hate that fucking stupid show more than ever. FML

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Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

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Today, I got a new comfy duvet and pillow and was looking forward to a good night's sleep. I got into bed and was followed by my dog, who then threw up the tub of butter he had just stolen from the kitchen onto my brand new bed spread. FML

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Today, I finally had sex after 3 long years. It lasted less than a minute, followed by 2 hours of talking about anime.. I'm in my 30s. FML

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Today, my period came two days late. After fretting for two days, my body made it up to me by sticking three days of symptoms in one day. I needed Tylenol, Ibuprofen, Scotch, and cuddles before I got any relief. FML

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