Sex, Weird Intimacy Weird party

Weird party

Username - 19/02/2011 07:57 - China

Today, while at a party, a cute topless woman sat next to me to flirt with the guy on the other end of the couch. This is the closest I've been to a pair of boobs in 3 years. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Late bloomer

Forever Lonely - 13/06/2023 22:00 - South Africa - Centurion

Today, I saw one of my best friends having sex with a girl at a party. It was the first time I'd ever seen a girl naked. FML

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The best time of your life

Anonymous - 02/08/2021 20:01

Today, the girl I've been flirting with for a few weeks invited me to a house party. I gradually found out that she's been talking to my good buddy, they've been dating, actually they've been banging the whole time. And now she's in a bikini bouncing on his lap as we play Cards Against Humanity. FML

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cumguzzler - 06/03/2009 16:14 - United States

Today, I was at this awesome party and I was dancing with this really attractive girl who started making out with me all of a sudden. Five minutes later, my friend told me that the girl had just given him a blowjob. FML

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Unfortunate boner

Man - 02/07/2025 06:00 - United States - Edison

Today, I was at a party, and a cute girl in a skirt sat on my lap. We were flirting and I unfortunately got hard. She then stood up and yelled, "Are you getting hard? EW!" FML

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Anonymous - 05/06/2009 20:54 - Denmark

Today, I was at a bar. A fat guy looks at me for a while and sits down next to me. He turns and I expect that he'll hit on me. He then buttons down his shirt, presses his man boobs together and say to his friends “Look, I’ve got bigger tits than than the girl next to me!" His friends agreed. FML

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Noname - 15/02/2009 20:28 - United States

Today, I was at a fraternity party, and one of the hosts said over the loudspeaker "turn to the person next to you and picture them naked, then drink a beer if the mental image disturbs you". I turned, only to be face-to-face with my ex-boyfriend. He drank two beers. FML

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Let 'em loose

Anonymous - 07/05/2025 09:00 - United States - Washington

Today, I sat next to my crush in class in a very loose, low-hanging shirt in the front (my mother had made me wear it, I didn't want to), and I felt so giddy because he kept staring at me in shock. No, not because I'm so beautiful, but because my boobs were hanging out. FML

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sad - 26/02/2010 19:17 - United States

Today, I saw boobs, in person, for the first time. Too bad they were my mom's and I'm 27. FML

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Anonymous - 19/04/2016 15:59 - United States - De Soto

Today, I was at a party. A guy kept looking at me, so I tried to strike up a conversation with him. I realized he was drunk when he slurred, "Ya know, you're the only girl I've met that's fat AND flat chested!" There goes my self-esteem. FML

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florisvanlent - 12/02/2009 16:17 - Netherlands

Today, while copying some stuff for school, I felt someone rubbing her boobs against my back. I got a boner and when I looked to see who the hot chick was, I saw my fat friend rubbing his man boobs against my back. FML

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eduardosuritalov 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 16:18

she musta been pretty ugly if she had to go shirtless to get a guys attention =/

Jaguar1234 0

Saturday 19 February 2011 16:06

shoulda started a conversation

fml933 0

Sunday 20 February 2011 9:13

this kind i mean

shaytards_fml 9

Sunday 20 February 2011 12:56

chinese girls have boobs?? I didn't know that

sxyKarri_94 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 6:12

Aww that sucks

4evermossin 0

Friday 25 February 2011 21:47

start with wonderful breasts were having i mean weather.... humor is a good way to start a conversation

theUBERcomment 1

Saturday 26 February 2011 18:22

you live at a sausage fest

anonymous595 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 17:28

luky basterd..the other lad

alexxss_fml 10

Monday 4 July 2011 17:27

were they made in china?

Leser98 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 4:36

Fun

burro_fml 6

Saturday 5 November 2011 13:42

(.)(.)

aliceperez 6

Monday 16 January 2012 8:41

What kind of party were you at??

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I woke up to my cat licking my face. Cute, right? Turns out, she was licking the crumbs off my cheek from last night's pizza party. FML

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Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML

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Today, my boyfriend of a year and a half left me for another girl. Who was the only person who cared enough to comfort me? The girl he left me for. FML

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Today, I started out as a serious artist, I even got some of my work displayed in galleries. Now I live in my mom’s attic and I manage to pay her some rent by drawing furry porn for online perverts. I’ve drawn so many hair-covered buttholes I don’t even get upset anymore. FML

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Today, my fiancé and I went on a tourism boat. There was drinks, food, and a Motown cover band. My man famously has no rhythm, but he’s out on the dance floor and all the guests are loving him. I didn’t dance, and everyone was looking at me like the wet blanket holding him back. FML

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Today, while on vacation, my parents called to inform me that my best friend had died in a car accident. Why? To trick me into tearfully confessing my love for him. It worked. FML

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