Miscellaneous: Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt....

By yum yogurt - 30/10/2011 20:15 - United States

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 461

You deserved it 17 148

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By GogurtBadass - 18/09/2013 16:55 - United States - Olympia

Today, I accidentally punched myself in the mouth while eating a Go-Gurt. I was eating it because I'd just had my wisdom teeth removed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 676

You deserved it 5 382

Sorry Sharon

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 16:00

Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 647

You deserved it 241

Fight Club

By Nose bleed - 16/04/2014 02:48 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was eating an apple in class. When I went to take a big bite, my teeth went right through the apple, causing me to scrape the apple right up my face. My nose then started to bleed. I'm now known as the girl who punched herself in the face with an apple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 324

You deserved it 7 829

By Bad at life - 18/10/2018 13:30

Today, I pulled a muscle in my face. Chewing gum. For the second time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 090

You deserved it 632

By Amy - 10/05/2012 19:14 - Canada - Prince George

Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 054

You deserved it 5 245

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 136

Fight! Fight!

By LostInSunday - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, I accidentally slapped myself in the face with my belt when I pulled it from my belt loops too quickly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 557

You deserved it 2 953

By Anonymous - 13/03/2011 22:26 - United States

Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 766

You deserved it 73 926

By Dipping Tired - 20/04/2016 23:17 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, while half asleep, I dipped my finger in ketchup instead of a fry, and bit down on it so hard I needed stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 764

You deserved it 7 209

Night fight

By FistFighter - 09/04/2011 04:01 - United States

Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 949

You deserved it 12 986

boredblonde 17

Sunday 30 October 2011 23:48

definitely worth it, gogurts are the best!

DrOfTheInternet 6

Sunday 30 October 2011 23:51

Fruit punch?

Comments

itsalanis 25

Monday 31 October 2011 1:36

they have tube rollers now, ya know...

Skittlepickle 13

Monday 31 October 2011 1:43

Let's spend money on something for I'm gonna eat then throw away, when I have my fingers for free..

ChenelZepeda 0

Monday 31 October 2011 1:45

iDo That All The Time >__

iDaniel525 8

Monday 31 October 2011 1:49

GoGet yourself some tissues.

Liimitless 6

Monday 31 October 2011 1:50

Classic.

heathz 9

Monday 31 October 2011 1:56

the only way I can see this happening is ripping open the top with UNnatural force

VUStudent 0

Monday 31 October 2011 1:57

You. Are. My. HERO!! XD

beastiness 14

Monday 31 October 2011 2:02

they still make those?

Mishal_fml 5

Monday 31 October 2011 2:05

Haha i know exactly how u did that u were using your hand to slide the yogurt up and your hand slid off and up into your face

tamoodielovesmar 1

Monday 31 October 2011 2:07

i don't see any connection between those two things

adammaxum 2

Monday 31 October 2011 2:08

funny funny

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend with candles and a sexy outfit. When he came in, he insisted that we needed music to help set the mood. Thirty minutes later, he's still searching for a song. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 067

You deserved it 3 111

Today, my family is getting ready for a vacation. My idea of a vacation is being on a beach, staying in a luxurious hotel, with cute guys and great restaurants everywhere. Unfortunately, we are going to be sleeping in a cold tent in the mountains, cook over a fire, and listen to bears stomp around at night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 268

You deserved it 676

Today, a customer filed a complaint against me because my coworker took too long to do a price check. I hate my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 223

You deserved it 1 340

Today, I saw a girl making out with presumably her boyfriend. This wouldn’t be a problem if she hadn’t told me she was asexual and didn’t like to be touched. The worst part is this isn’t even the first time this has happened to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 692

You deserved it 355

Today, I sent a message to my crush saying, “Hey, how are you?” I immediately followed it up with another message that said, “Oops, wrong person,” because I panicked. Now he probably thinks I wasn’t even trying to talk to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95

You deserved it 619

Today, my husband told me he didn't want me to get power tools to build things, because he thinks a miter saw and a sanding orbiter are more dangerous than guns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 340

You deserved it 179