Fast food, ACAB Transportation This is fine

This is fine

Anonymous - 16/07/2011 23:09 - United States

Today, I was given a DUI while in the Whataburger drive thru. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

ironic driver - 04/09/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML

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DWIcop - 03/04/2019 00:00

Today, while leaving our county courthouse after testifying as the arresting officer in multiple DWI cases, I hit a wrong way sign in the court’s parking lot. All the defense attorneys were outside, asking me if I was drunk. FML

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driverman12 - 04/04/2009 19:42 - United States

Today, I was driving on the freeway when I saw a car in front of me swerving across 3 lanes of traffic. Thinking he might be drunk, I dialed 911 on my phone, but I dropped it. I fished under my seat to get it, swerving, and got pulled over by highway patrol and given a field sobriety test. FML

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notdrivinganytimesoon - 04/03/2015 02:35 - United States - Richardson

Today, I got pulled over during my driving test. FML

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Anonymous - 25/08/2011 06:49 - United States

Today, I was the designated driver. On the way home with my drunk friends, they decide to give me a beer shower. I swerved, and was pulled over by a cop moments after. I was the only one arrested. FML

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hockusa3 - 11/09/2014 15:44 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, I was driving to the DMV to take a test, after getting some points removed from my license. On the way there, I got a speeding ticket and got my license suspended completely. FML

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Anonymous - 14/03/2012 07:33 - United States

Today, I got pulled over for drunk driving. This is the second time its happened. I was completely sober both times. FML

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Anonymous - 31/12/2009 20:10 - United States

Today, I got in a car accident on the way to the DMV to take my drivers test. FML

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Anonymous - 02/07/2016 19:29 - United States - Greeley

Today, I got threatened with a gun at the drive-thru, all because my coworker forgot to include extra fries in the guy's order. FML

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Ladyfarquard - 21/07/2019 04:03

Today, I got charged with drink driving, without even driving my car. FML

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shadowtrooper 0

Sunday 17 July 2011 1:34

hahaha dude stop drinking and driving

littlemissalex 3

Sunday 17 July 2011 1:35

Don't drink and drive, it's that simple. I dot care if you kill yourself doing it, but don't you dare kill an innocent person

Sangheili_Fan 9

Sunday 17 July 2011 20:36

Don't drink and drive thru.

sesshomarupop 0

Sunday 17 July 2011 20:39

Yeah whataburger! :D good 'ol texas and their drinking

luvzcats 3

Sunday 17 July 2011 20:59

Whataburger is a fast food chain in Texas. ITS AMAZING But yeah dude, don't drink and drive. :p

Chamuko89_fml 0

Sunday 17 July 2011 21:15

Lmfao

tellis1187 0

Monday 18 July 2011 0:10

and thts why u dnt walk up to the drive thru window fool

Johnnygirl13 0

Monday 18 July 2011 1:14

A DUI is driving under the influence.... a DWI is driving while intoxicatedn... if you look back at the post he/she received a DUI dumbass...

iMagzzzy 0

Monday 18 July 2011 2:57

I didnt know they allow you on FML in jail.

Grindin322 0

Monday 18 July 2011 2:58

#7 w/ sweet tea!!!

Grindin322 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:01

90% of the people that go to whataburger are drunk... profiling is wrong lol

snafu63 0

Monday 18 July 2011 3:10

driving through a drive thru drunk still counts as drinking and driving idiot.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I'm working in China and I had to explain to my boss that no, it's not okay to not pay me for 3 months. FML

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Today, I realized I’m what they call “first world poor.” I own a phone and a laptop paid for with credit, and every time I use them it’s to check my emails to see all my new job application rejections, and to check my bank so I can watch my savings dwindling away. FML

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Today, at my annual checkup, the doc looks down at my foot and says, "Oh, you have an extra toenail. Six, huh?" Then sort of scraping at the side of my foot below the pinky toe, he pulls off a long piece of dead, dried skin and says, "Oh." FML

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Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML

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Today, I lost my virginity. It was painful, but not as painful as my boyfriend asking afterwards: "Um... did you use to be a guy?" FML

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Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML

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