Miscellaneous, Poopoo peepee, Toilet and Smells: The Destroyer

The Destroyer

By mr_p - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300-pound man walked out, shook his head, and said, "I'm sorry" to me. FML

agreeclassic 38 551

vote type 1 3 688

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By Anonymous - 16/07/2013 04:41 - United States

Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML

agreeclassic 50 210

vote type 1 3 374

Oh shit…

By half-dead in CA - 31/05/2014 16:39 - United States - San Francisco

Today, as I was standing in line at the checkout, the elderly guy in front turned around and said quietly to me, "Sometimes I shit my pants." He then nodded grimly and turned back around, hitting me with the full force of the stench now coming from his pants. FML

agreeclassic 47 352

vote type 1 4 017

Stinky and gross

By Anonymous - 09/06/2024 20:00 - Canada

Today, I was at a crowded restaurant and rushed to the bathroom. In my haste, I didn't notice I had walked into the men's room until I was washing my hands and a guy walked in, gave me a puzzled look, and said, "You're brave." FML

agreeclassic 179

vote type 1 373

Chub rub

By Anonymous - 19/03/2021 13:59 - United States - Malvern

Today, I was pooping in a public toilet and a kid had walked in on me. I then heard him tell his dad, "It's okay, I didn't see anything, he was fat so his chubby legs hid it." FML

agreeclassic 913

vote type 1 198

Infrastructure

By Anonymous - 14/07/2025 00:00 - United Kingdom - Swindon

Today, I was using a public toilet stall when the lock gave way, and the door swung open halfway. I froze, and the person who was washing his hands at the sinks looked at me in the mirror and awkwardly said, “I see you.” I muttered, “I’m sorry,” as he walked out looking like he'd seen a ghost. FML

agreeclassic 371

vote type 1 101

We could be heroes

By OhPleaseNo - 07/04/2020 14:00 - OhPleaseNo

Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML

agreeclassic 1 731

vote type 1 209

Good one, thanks

By FUCKFACECUNT - 02/08/2015 13:32 - United Arab Emirates - Abu Dhabi

Today, I took a dump at work, when I realized there was no toilet paper left. There was another guy in the room, so I asked him for some. He decided he'd rather dump all the rolls of paper into the other toilets, before wishing me luck and walking out while laughing his ass off. FML

agreeclassic 29 702

vote type 1 2 396

By dani - 25/03/2014 03:39 - United States - Dayton

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

agreeclassic 52 051

vote type 1 13 633

By toosmall - 31/01/2009 21:40 - United States

Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML

agreeclassic 32 620

vote type 1 2 614

By Anonymous - 01/07/2013 05:50 - United States - Austin

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

agreeclassic 59 820

vote type 1 3 917

5t3ff1k4h 44

Tuesday 2 November 2010 1:28

Oh dear. That's a shitty situation.

Iknowthings 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 1:31

I wonder how much he weighed before he went in?

Comments

xX_rawr_KiTTiEXx 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 3:38

Must've been a shitty bathroom anyway.

xX_rawr_KiTTiEXx 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 3:40

i was thinking the same thing #42

grog_fml 3

Tuesday 2 November 2010 3:43

hilarious.

Chunkylover76 4

Tuesday 2 November 2010 3:44

I would have totally done the same thing! Big guy had a sense of humour!!

JaReDdAbOsS 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 3:50

that sucks

salaamdelroba 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 3:52

Rofl @ #13

Captainjack1 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 3:52

i wonder if the toilet still stands

JUST_STFU_N_GTFO 0

Tuesday 2 November 2010 4:01

He flooded the toilet!

MeganCello 8

Tuesday 2 November 2010 4:17

@54, steelers ROCKKKKK! :D Sorry, that was totally irrelevant... *quietly slips out of conversation*

vbmg152 18

Tuesday 2 November 2010 4:29

That's crappy!! ;-)

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Today, my boss offered to give me a ride on her way home. Two seconds before getting into the car, I had to let out a fart. I didn't think the fart would follow me in, but it did. She rolled down the windows, and we lapsed into a silent, awkward ride home. FML

agreeclassic 1 693

vote type 1 871

Today, I told the man my girlfriend has been cheating on me with all about her infidelity. He didn't get angry; he just said that he knew, that they were in an open relationship, and that I was pretty stupid to have not figured it out sooner. FML

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vote type 1 6 282

Today, I found out that my overprotective brother is going to move in with me when he gets out of jail. My chances of ever being in a relationship are now next to zero. FML

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vote type 1 4 673

Today, I watched a grizzled old gas station attendant, with a stain on her blouse, use my driver's license to pick something out of her teeth. FML

agreeclassic 36 255

vote type 1 2 921

Today, my mom had me arrested in the most humiliating way ever, in my nightgown, with no bra. She pushed me out her vagina, and now her life. FML

agreeclassic 189

vote type 1 419

Today, I had to put my 17 year-old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML

agreeclassic 37 246

vote type 1 3 873