Intimacy Thanks!

Thanks!

womboman - 30/07/2011 20:02 - United States

Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza delivery. I had to stand out in the rain for ten minutes while an old redneck dude wearing nothing but camo boxers fumbled around for the exact change to pay the bill. I think seeing his junk was supposed to count as my tip. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

micheal - 21/06/2011 16:52 - United States

Today, while I was delivering pizza in the torrential downpour, I waited 5 minutes in the pouring rain for an old lady to dig 20 bucks out of her purse. Her total was $19.99. She told me to keep the change and make lots of money. FML

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Thanks, lady

ronniewciv - 30/12/2010 07:48

Today, I was delivering pizza in the rain. A woman answered the door, saw me soaking wet and said, "Wow this rain is terrible, it must be horrible to be out delivering in it." She then tipped me 21 cents. FML

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Currency

PizzaBwaaay - 03/05/2022 22:00

Today, I was delivering pizzas and hit up a dude’s house who ordered two boxes of extra large. He gave me the exact change. I asked him, “What about the tip?” He paused for a minute, let out this loud rancid fart and said, “There’s your tip bub, now piss off!” and shut the door in my face. FML

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Cano951 - 16/12/2011 20:16 - United States

Today, I was bitched out by a pizza delivery man. I didn't have the cash to pay him for a pizza I didn't even order. FML

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It never rains, it pours

jaeilssanguh - 26/11/2009 18:49 - United States

Today, I was walking in rain. I had my hands in my pants pockets, so that the front of the jacket was pointing down. Halfway to Taco Bell, my crotch felt exceptionally wet. I looked down to see a wet spot. The rain on my jacket was channeled to my crotch. FML

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All in a day's work

Steve-noh - 10/08/2018 23:30

Today, at my job as a waiter I sharted myself while taking an order. They tipped me $20 and wrote "for new underwear" on the receipt. FML

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dammit33 - 28/05/2012 13:55 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I got a $20 tip from an old lady I delivered pizza to. Ecstatic, I walked back to my car where there was a $30 parking fine waiting for me. FML

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Protip

Tipless - 07/11/2009 05:36 - United States

Today, I was working as a Valet driver. After getting no customers for 5 hours in the pouring rain, a woman driving by stops and asks me for directions. Before leaving, she said, "I should probably tip you for that, since that's probably the only money you'd get all night." She didn't. FML

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richgirl - 25/02/2010 00:15 - United States

Today, I was doing takeout orders at the restaurant I work at. I spent a long while putting together this guy's $135.00 order. When he finally got there to pick it up, I told him to fill out the credit card slip. I looked at it after he left. He gave me a 40 cent tip. FML

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It's not what you think

Anonymous - 21/02/2022 00:00 - United States

Today, I was delivering food for GrubHub. I spilled a tiny portion of the customer’s lemonade. It was not enough to notice any was missing, but enough to notice. The customer was an attractive guy, who thought I peed my pants. FML

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Thabb 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 1:08

You should be honored, to rednecks that's a huge achievement.

Salvikidd 6

Sunday 31 July 2011 1:27

did you see his 16 year old wife?

scaryasfuck666 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 4:01

Well...At least he had one!

beaglegun 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 4:14

Sterotyoe

sxe_beast 11

Sunday 31 July 2011 4:43

I think I've seen a gay porno similar to this... Yum?

ifeelya 5

Sunday 31 July 2011 5:27

you know he is a redneck if...

keywestsmiles 2

Sunday 31 July 2011 5:48

Oh rednecks... Ya gotta love 'em. The world wouldn't be the same without em.

chahacha599 0

Sunday 31 July 2011 6:31

welcome to america

Nevitt 9

Sunday 31 July 2011 7:05

well did his junk look nice? if it did, i envy you....

SadinSherman 16

Monday 1 August 2011 6:34

Isn't that what the Internet is for?

Groucho_fml 5

Sunday 31 July 2011 7:31

I'm sure rednecks are eternally grateful for that pitiful attempt at a defense. I've seen your other comments, and for future reference, the word is spelled "stereotype."