Intimacy, Sex, Anxiety Cops Straight to jail - FML

Straight to jail

Miss bad decisions - 03/11/2023 22:00

Today, my boyfriend and I got busted having public sex. In desperation, I promised the officer he could fuck me if he let us go. Now I've got an extra charge and probably an ex-boyfriend. FML

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Caught in 4K

RBergman - 25/04/2015 20:05 - United States - Basin

Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML

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Hello hello hello

Bonnie and Clyde - 08/05/2015 02:18 - United States - Humble

Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML

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ifhehadadickforaheaditdbefuckingsmall - 10/03/2013 18:50 - Cyprus - Strovolos

Today, my husband was arrested for having sex in public. FML

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Caught red-handed

Anonymous - 30/11/2020 20:04

Today, my girlfriend and I got busted by the cops having sex in a dark parking lot near the beach. As if that wasn't bad enough, as I was trying to talk my way out of a ticket, one of the cops peeks into the car window and I hear my girlfriend awkwardly giggle and say, "Hi daddy." FML

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Smooth criminal

nickim756 - 13/09/2010 02:29 - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying he needed me to bail him out of jail. The crime? Masturbating in public. FML

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loveade11 - 12/01/2010 19:28 - France

Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were butt naked in his new Ford Expedition. FML

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DemCherries - 28/03/2017 15:00 - United States - Overland Park

Today, at my job as a police officer, I had to arrest my own girlfriend for having sex at Walmart. She tried to get me to let her out on the grounds of being "pretty" and dating me. She wants to continue the relationship. FML

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The nerve of some people

Inga44 - - United States

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past four months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

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Adventure time

Spice gone wrong - 31/05/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, my normally very unadventurous girlfriend decided she wanted to have public sex. We were naked in the back of her car when she saw someone in the distance, had a panic attack, and started screaming uncontrollably. I got arrested because a cop heard the screams and thought I was attacking her. FML

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Khrixas_069 - 18/06/2011 07:10 - United States

Today, I was about to make love to my girlfriend at the local park when a cop caught us. I had to give him our information and hold a conversation with "Fire and Ice" lubricant on my penis. FML

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TomeDr 24

Saturday 4 November 2023 11:12

I wish I could vote YDI more than once. What an idiot!! 🤦‍♀️

thefmlman2011 36

Saturday 4 November 2023 1:11

legend for the public sex, but idiot for coming onto the police officer.

thefmlman2011 36

Saturday 4 November 2023 1:11

legend for the public sex, but idiot for coming onto the police officer.

TomeDr 24

Saturday 4 November 2023 11:12

I wish I could vote YDI more than once. What an idiot!! 🤦‍♀️

BurnInDemonFire 35

Monday 6 November 2023 5:43

Damn girl. Learn to keep it in your pants until you get home. And don't proposition a cop with sex. Again.

MistressAfrodite 5

Thursday 23 November 2023 8:03

that’s one hell of a panic 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Rake 17

Monday 6 May 2024 6:46

You do know that those **** movies are just made up?

DLBL 20

Thursday 18 December 2025 20:45

Ew. That's just gross.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I fractured a bone in my foot by dropping a shampoo bottle on it. FML

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Today, I'm on a long car trip with a friend who makes fun of my pee breaks every 45 minutes. "Well, are you incontinent? You should wear diapers, otherwise we'll never reach our destination!" What she doesn't know : I have bladder issues, and even if I try not to use them, I do wear diapers. FML

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Today, for Christmas, I got the 3-month anniversary of a constant cold and cough, my period, plus the diagnosis that I have been secretly left-handed for 40 years, and need to switch sides now if I want to unfuck my physical and mental health. What I still don't have are decent boots - I've been hunting them for 3 years. FML

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Today, my wife and I moved into our new place. I'm recovering from back surgery and out of work. To help make up the rent, her boyfriend moved in too. FML

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Today, I couldn’t figure out why I was getting so much spam in my professional email. My own mother thought it would be a hilarious “prank” to sign me up for a ton of random mailing lists. I missed an amazing job opportunity due to her bullshit. FML

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Today, my father used my birth certificate as a beer coaster. Accident or not, it pretty much perfectly sums up our relationship. FML

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