Miscellaneous Roasted

Roasted

wordmalfunction - 25/05/2009 21:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I was preparing a dinner for some business associates, in hopes of closing the deal on a promotion. I emailed them with the menu, in case there were any allergies. Hours later, I checked the email again to find that instead of serving Roast Duck I would be serving Roast Fuck. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Mels - 06/01/2014 20:57 - United States - Boston

Today, I found a great recipe for dinner, and emailed it to myself with the subject "Dinner tonight". Hours later, I'd forgotten all about it, opened my emails, saw the subject line, and thought someone was asking me out to dinner. I got really excited until I saw the sender address. FML

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I know her so well

Anonymous - 20/01/2025 00:00 - United States - Detroit

Today, I spent a good deal of my afternoon preparing a nice dinner for my girlfriend. When I finally served the meal, I proudly presented her with a beautifully arranged plate of salmon. She looked at it and said, “You know I’m allergic to fish, right?” We had cereal for dinner instead. FML

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A man without a plan

Anonymous - 31/01/2023 16:30

Today, I was going to surprise my partner with a romantic dinner, but when I got home I realized I had forgotten the main ingredient: the food. FML

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Chefinblack - 19/10/2015 22:13 - Australia

Today, at my prestigious sous chef job, I was preparing to plate up expensive entrees for a function of 150 people. After arriving to work 2 hours early to finalize finishing touches, they call the restaurant 5 minutes before their booking stating, 'We can't be bothered anymore, sorry.' FML

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Big Brother shopping task IRL

Anonymous - 19/10/2023 07:30 - Germany

Today, I sent an important email to my entire team, but I accidentally left a shopping list as the subject line. They responded with grocery items they needed. Nobody mentioned the email content. FML

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fuckthisandfuckthatandfuckyoutoo - 28/07/2013 16:23 - United States

Today, I was preparing a customer's meal in my restaurant's kitchen, when I choked on my own saliva and went into a coughing fit. The head chef, who's always hated my guts, accused me of trying to hock a loogie into the meal and fired me on the spot. FML

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Whoopsx99 - 30/01/2010 19:21 - United States

Today, I accidentally emailed the entire company everyone's salary, sales history, and the names of four people I intended to fire. FML

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Welcome!

Annoyed - 27/04/2025 00:00 - Canada

Today, I invited a friend over for dinner and spent hours preparing a fancy meal. When I opened the door, he walked in with his new girlfriend, his mom, his sister, and his dog. I barely had enough food for one, let alone five. I ended up serving my fancy meal on paper plates. FML

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Introvert struggles

knife knife - - United Kingdom - Dalkeith

Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML

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Oops - 14/01/2010 15:55 - United States

Today, while at work at a maternity and baby clothes store, I was supposed to send out an email about our "Beat the Clock" sale. After it was sent to over 500 people, I realized that I'd misspelled the subject line. It read, "Beat the Cock Sale." FML

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PsychoX 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:30

So are you male or female? This will be the determining factor of the promotion after that email.

lame9379 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:29

YDI for not checking your spelling before sending an important email out.

scorpiogirl666 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:33

#6: spellcheck wouldn't have worked anyway..

DoctorManhattan 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:33

Proofreading, muthafucka, do you speak it?

musicfanatic 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:33

i heard that food is the SEX, but i'm a little skeptical.

t6a6m6m6y 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:34

what an awesome ice breaker roll with it dang I would make it out to be so funny and then everyone will feel comfy and at home!!!

illeyad 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:34

always spell check! However it was funny :D

alexgisforme3 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:34

who could ever eat a duck...thats sick. theyre such cute, nice animals who deserve to be free in the ponds =).

AUT_student 0

Tuesday 26 May 2009 2:34

#6 - spellcheck would let that through, because it wasn't a mis-spelling, just an incorrect word. OP - hopefully the business asscoiates let that slide, if they trip you up from a promotion over that, you may not want it anyway. Good luck.