Intimacy Nope out of there

Nope out of there

twintowers - 04/07/2009 20:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Ahem

Bucko321 - 30/03/2009 01:18 - Canada

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML

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Anonymous - 22/05/2010 23:22 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

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Pull up

ohdeargodthatswrong - 09/01/2010 13:25 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML

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Listening in

Anonymous - 20/11/2012 03:19 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, my long-distance boyfriend and I decided to be a bit naughty on Skype. It was 3am so we assumed that my dad was asleep and did some dirty talk. When we were done, I heard my dad laughing outside my room; he'd heard it all. FML

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Mortified

killmenow - 21/02/2011 01:19 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML

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Scolded

oopsies - 08/01/2010 01:07 - United States

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

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iris - 18/05/2012 23:01 - Portugal - Lisbon

Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML

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meeranda - 01/01/2010 05:07 - France

Today, my dad came home from work early only to walk in on me and the boy I'm not supposed to be seeing having sex. Did I mention doggie style? FML

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Lisa - 02/01/2010 07:02 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw". It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parent's house and forgot his phone. FML

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Cold shower

MrAwsum - 17/03/2009 20:40 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML

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emery52 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 23:28

i never understood phone sex

icehot 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 2:45

when you start pushing the pound key over and over

ChasinParkedCars 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:04

At least you're dad wasn't on the other line...

maupa 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:08

Phone sex ALWAYS, and I mean ALWAYS, means trouble. Intercourse ftw!

saxiigirlie 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:14

Are you frikkin retarded? Wtf is phone sex? Why can't you just be a normal person nd have regular sex??

Cloudy_fml 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:27

Tsk tsk, kids today and their aural sex. =p

SoniaLovesYou 0

Monday 6 July 2009 21:45

Cloudy, you are made of win.

Kuroftw 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:27

What #4 said.

glitter_kiss 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:38

lmao @ #11,#10 and #26

grlwitperlEring 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:44

YDI for having phone sex instead of real sex

dennisjara91 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:48

haha looks like people were right when they said "chivalry is dead"

lizzzie_fml 0

Sunday 5 July 2009 0:53

so your dad took you out of a situation where, as far as I'm aware, no one has ever gotten pregnant, and instead put you in the same room, knowing you're in the mood, and proceeded to talk about sex? Seems he'd have been better off leaving you be - phone sex is one of the safest forms out there.