Break-ups Love News to me - FML

News to me

looz - 29/12/2008 07:21 - France

Today, I went out for a drink with my girlfriend. Everything was going smoothly until her phone rang, she took the call and cut whoever it was off quite quickly by saying, "I can't talk right now, I'm in the middle of a break-up." I certainly wasn't aware. FML

34 922

2 154

Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Jeff make - 01/04/2012 14:03 - United States - Malvern

Today, I called my girlfriend saying "I think we need to break up." She said "No, I don't think so," and hung up. FML

20 434

34 485

kukadaman - 15/03/2010 06:19 - United States

Today, I came home to hear my girlfriend break up with me, over the answering machine, with my entire family in the room. FML

34 635

2 392

Anonymous - 17/08/2018 14:30

Today, I called my boyfriend and a woman answered. Turns out, she's also his girlfriend. She broke up with me on his behalf. FML

3 582

226

fucklife - 16/04/2013 18:13 - United States - Washington

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML

63 566

5 213

socialix - 19/04/2015 01:03 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML

33 741

3 430

On the sauce

drinkdrankdrunk - 27/09/2013 07:33 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML

44 283

17 933

Breaking news

Anonymous - 01/03/2009 20:02 - United States

Today, I got a phone call from my mother asking me if I was okay. Confused, I asked her what she meant. She then told me that my boyfriend had broken up with me, and she just wanted to make sure I was handling it alright. I had to find out my relationship was over from my mom. FML

77 007

3 705

Eternity

Anonymous - 06/04/2013 16:17 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, I took my girlfriend to eat out at a restaurant. We chatted for an hour, and it all seemed to be going well, until she told me that she wanted to break up. Waiting for the bill and driving her home was the most painful time of my life. FML

45 790

3 632

Easy fix

failure - 13/10/2010 06:18 - Australia

Today, I rang my girlfriend to make sure she made it home alright. She told me to check my Facebook. Nothing was different so I hit refresh. We were no longer in a relationship. I got dumped via Facebook whilst on the phone to her. FML

38 448

3 112

Double dump

dumped - 10/03/2011 21:42 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML

38 544

4 032

24788 6

Saturday 2 May 2009 7:00

Wow, she almost was trying to be a bitch on that one.

D29 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 1:13

She planned that.

Abcdfg 0

Friday 10 April 2009 15:30

What happened nxt?

Squirrellord911 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 3:31

Ow... what a bitch

24788 6

Saturday 2 May 2009 7:00

Wow, she almost was trying to be a bitch on that one.

amsftw 0

Saturday 15 October 2011 0:59

Almost?

D29 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 1:13

She planned that.

Jordans436 11

Sunday 25 September 2016 12:52

I was thinking the same thing, it's quite obvious but you never know.

Manpersonguythin 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 22:22

Well, She's pretty bad at breaking up.

djbean09 0

Monday 1 June 2009 20:10

hahaha thats ****** up

emt430 0

Saturday 6 June 2009 8:31

Bitch...

albinorhino 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 6:25

Wow

crutchboy90 0

Thursday 11 June 2009 20:23

**** her

ropeandneck 7

Thursday 20 December 2012 6:14

only if she agrees with break up sex, apparently..

Pankti 0

Monday 3 August 2009 19:49

ouch..feel sry for you

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was getting sick of listening to the guy in the next room over getting nasty with some girl, so I called my girlfriend to see if she wanted to go get some food. Then I heard her phone ring. Through the wall. FML

525 007

37 080

Today, I asked my husband to watch our kids while I cooked food for him. Apparently I asked in the wrong tone, because now he's pouting and won't eat. FML

2 895

391

Today, I had to deal with my crazy new neighbour who tried to physically stop me from laying my new driveway, on my property, because she claimed she’s allergic to cement while it’s still wet. Even if that were true, piss off back to your house away from the wet cement then. FML

1 030

101

Today, my in-laws came to visit from their home country. They were shocked and appalled when they saw the kids helping out around the house. They then asked earnestly why I make my sons clean up instead of making my daughter do it so she can “train” to be a good wife. FML

647

119

Today, my mother and I got into an argument, and she told me to go to my room. I refused, prompting her to slap the shit out of me. I'm 29, and she was visiting me at my own house. FML

63 715

6 466

Today, I decided to take a nap in the university library. I felt like I'd only closed my eyes for a minute, when a guy woke me up to tell me that I'd been farting in my sleep for the last half hour, and that the librarian was becoming concerned. FML

32 974

9 113