Awkward, Language Love Negging

Negging

f*ck - 02/05/2012 16:22 - United States

Today, I had a date with the girl I've been interested in for months. I'm pretty laid-back and casual with my friends, which backfired and caused the date to end with a slap, when I greeted her with a friendly "S'up, slut?" FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Anon - 30/01/2009 11:39 - Canada

Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML

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Casual

Patrick - 11/04/2025 09:00 - United States

Today, I went to meet a friend for coffee. When I arrived, I mistakenly thought it was a casual meet-up, but apparently, it was a date. I didn’t realize this until she leaned in for a kiss at the end, and I awkwardly offered her a fist bump instead. FML

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smooth - 21/11/2013 16:10 - United States

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

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firstdate - 24/01/2010 19:32 - United States

Today, I was on my first date with my crush. When I saw her, I greeted her with, "Hey, sweetheart." She's convinced I said, "Hey, retard." FML

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Let down

heartbreakkid21 - 14/05/2009 15:22 - United States

Today, I was on a date with this girl I actually like. The date was going really well and it seemed like it would be a good night. While in the movie theater, I went to hold her hand and instead she gave me a hand shake and said, "You're so funny, I'm so glad we're friends". FML

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Anonymous - 01/03/2014 18:46 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I went on a date with a girl my friend set me up with. I thought we got along great, until after dessert, when I asked if she'd be interested in doing this again. She just said, "Nahhh" then got up and casually left, stiffing me on the bill. FML

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newmoongirl1036 - 13/07/2015 02:03 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

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OMFG I LOVE MLP - 24/08/2012 21:00 - Germany - Mainz

Today, my friends set me up on a blind date. I thought it went well, and while saying our goodbyes, I leaned in to give her a kiss. She pulled way, laughed, "I'm not drunk enough for that," and left. FML

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tacoboy - 21/08/2009 08:06 - United States

Today, I was on a date with a girl I've had feelings for since I was 14 (I'm 22). I took her out to dinner, then to a movie that we both liked and had a few drinks afterwards. I thought it was going really well until I was driving her home and she asked to be dropped off at her boyfriend's house. FML

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The ex from hell

welpwelpwelp - 08/07/2015 17:45 - Australia - Canberra

Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML

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lexa1love 16

Wednesday 2 May 2012 23:31

Unless you are close friends I see no way in which that is appropriate. YDI

dazzle_me_lovely 9

Wednesday 2 May 2012 23:32

Are you an idiot?

Sir_Swaggington 6

Saturday 15 March 2014 17:54

How anyone can honestly think this is okay is just beyond my comprehension. She should've kicked you in the dick.

Jacobh137 1

Saturday 12 July 2014 22:26

you are such an idiot

dabears1011234 27

Thursday 7 August 2014 9:00

Nice.

LizReszke 11

Friday 29 August 2014 4:48

You are a complete douchebag to have said that to a girl. No wonder why your single.

NamelessFace 22

Sunday 14 September 2014 20:53

FYL? You pretty much asked for it! FHL, she thought she might be getting a nice date for once!

shessovain 7

Tuesday 16 September 2014 2:42

In what universe did you ever think that that was okay?

SexyMexi21 23

Monday 17 November 2014 3:35

YDI ended before it even began. shows what morals you have in regards to women and everyone else. You sound like a great guy .. ******* just kidding.

paolino_fml 18

Monday 29 December 2014 16:43

Smooth, gotta try and use it

jfoxxy6 15

Thursday 8 January 2015 16:56

You're a complete moron.

just_dorky_me 22

Thursday 26 March 2015 3:53

Friendly??

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was in the grocery store getting bananas and there was this real hot guy next to me. He said, "Hey beautiful" so I smiled. He then asked if I was free on Friday night. I smiled and said, "Yes, why do you ask?" He looked up from the bananas and pointed to the bluetooth in his ear. FML

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Today, I went to have dinner with my girlfriend and her family. It got silent, so, noticing her legs were darker than they were a few hours ago, I wanted to ask her if she used tanning lotion. I ended up asking her if her legs were fake. Her dad has prosthetic legs. FML

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Today, I wrote in my own yearbook with different styles of handwriting so my mom would think I have friends. FML

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Today, I had my final divorce proceeding. The judge denied my divorce because my husband is unemployed. I can't get a divorce until he gets a job to pay child support. He hasn't had a job for 3 years. FML

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Today, I got my first Facebook friend request in 4 months. I also got a message in my inbox. The message said: "Sorry, I thought you were someone else. Just ignore my friend request." FML

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Today, my parents decided they won't pay for college because of a Fox News story that said higher education "makes you liberal." FML

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