Intimacy, Sex Awkward Jumping the gun

Jumping the gun

Jenna - 12/10/2020 02:02

Today, my boyfriend of one week kissed my stomach and began speaking to our "baby." We haven't had sex yet. In fact, I'm still a virgin. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

baron - 01/06/2009 17:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML

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Anonymous - 28/10/2015 04:10 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I tried to hold my new boyfriend's hand while on a date. He let go quickly though, letting me know that we aren't at "that stage" of the relationship yet. We've been having sex for two weeks now. FML

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disapointed girl - 28/12/2009 16:58 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

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Jackedup - 18/05/2011 07:57 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML

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Absolute beginners

dancerr2210 - 09/06/2010 04:01 - United States

Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML

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Mini-wanker - 18/10/2011 17:34 - United States

Today, after having had sex with my girlfriend for the first time the night before, she went to the doctor. He said she's still physically a virgin. FML

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Anonymous - 04/03/2012 07:07 - United States

Today, things were getting heated with my boyfriend and I told him that I was finally ready to lose my virginity. Clearly he couldn't wait to get started because he fell asleep. FML

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ahhh - 03/08/2015 06:06 - United States - Northbrook

Today, my boyfriend of 2 months and I had sex for the first time last night. This afternoon he texted me saying, "I had an amazing night with you yesterday." Following that text he said, "I forgot to tell you I have an STD." FML

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Applelover012 - 08/07/2009 04:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years told me he was leaving me because we haven't slept together in a few weeks. I just gave birth to our first child and am still recovering from my c-section. FML

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Anonymous - 04/10/2009 21:40 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend's head was on my lap. I bent down to kiss him. My stomach rolls got there first. FML

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Chazzster 29

Monday 12 October 2020 4:50

Make sure you get on birth control ASAP. He intends to make you pregnant if you stay together. That’s not a good idea.

tounces7 27

Monday 12 October 2020 2:46

So, tone matters here, he's either really creepy, or he was just joking around.

Hangryko 31

Monday 25 December 2023 5:01

Yikes. I hope you dumped him.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML

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Today, a girl said to me, "Sorry, but I have a boyfriend". I hadn't said anything to her. FML

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Today, my teacher told me I wasn't pretty enough to play the princess part in the play. FML

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Today, at work, a customer told me how unprofessional my piercing made me look, and insisted that someone else wait on his table. It's not a piercing, it's a mole. FML

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Today, I was on a flight and one of my friends was sitting next to this woman who happened to be sleeping with her mouth wide open. My friend decided to take a picture. While I was editing it, a man sitting behind us said "If you want to take a picture of my girlfriend, wait until she's awake". FML

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Today, I had a horrible stomach flu and was well into my second hour of dry heaving when I heard my husband knock on the bathroom door. I was touched that he was worried about me, until I heard, "Honey, what did you make for dinner?" FML

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