Kids It's the monstaaaaah - FML

It's the monstaaaaah

Anonymous - 02/02/2021 21:30

Today, a 4 year-old saw me and started crying and screaming like heck. I mean, I knew that I didn't look good, but this is too much. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Wise kid

Anonymous - 23/11/2020 17:02

Today, I had to give my four year-old daughter some tough love, which I hate doing. When she ran away crying, my son, her twin brother, looked at me and said, "You should be ashamed of yourself." FML

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Check this out!

Anonymous - 10/08/2015 00:37 - United States - Plano

Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML

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mimo - 14/11/2008 04:16 - France

Today, I ate at a friend's house. Her 5-year-old son, who was at the table with us, looked at me and said quietly, "You're ugly." My friend told him off, causing him to cry, and shout, "But she isn't pretty!" FML

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-_- - 12/01/2014 08:03 - United States

Today, my wife told my 7-year-old son that he looks just like me. He began crying and said, "I don't want to be ugly like him." FML

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Say it ain't so

loserwithlice - 26/07/2009 18:58 - United States

Today, I told my 8 year-old daughter that she looks a lot like mommy. Now she won't come out of her room because she thinks she's ugly. FML

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unknown - 15/09/2011 00:21 - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML

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Smoothskin - 19/09/2013 21:18 - Australia - Heidelberg

Today, I shaved my face after several months of growth. This would be OK if my 4-year-old daughter would still talk to me. Apparently she doesn't recognise me, and I'm scary. FML

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Sorry dude

EatYourGreens - 21/08/2021 06:01 - Australia - Augustine Heights

Today, my four year-old very loudly asked me if the little person she saw at the shops was like that because he didn't eat his vegetables. He definitely heard. FML

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Reported

maximumpower - 15/03/2009 01:46 - United States

Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML

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Scaredshitless - 03/02/2010 13:48 - France

Today, after waiting to get home to go to the bathroom, my six year old neighbor popped out and literally scared the shit out of me. FML

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coius 23

Thursday 4 February 2021 8:39

I take offense to that. Let’s settle this outsid- Shit! Suns out! We’ll have to settle this later or Imma become a crisp fireball! (Edit: before people bitch, I’m a ginger too and full of freckles. I burn in 2 seconds in sunlight)

flagbitch 8

Thursday 4 February 2021 11:35

who else saw you?

diraven 15

Wednesday 3 February 2021 5:16

Are you a ginger?

coius 23

Thursday 4 February 2021 8:39

I take offense to that. Let’s settle this outsid- Shit! Suns out! We’ll have to settle this later or Imma become a crisp fireball! (Edit: before people bitch, I’m a ginger too and full of freckles. I burn in 2 seconds in sunlight)

flagbitch 8

Thursday 4 February 2021 11:35

who else saw you?

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I got caught checking out my porn collection while working. The embarrassment is compounded by the fact that I work from home, and I only flashed the folder on screen, but it was enough for coworkers to notice and now call me "King Dong". FML

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Today, I asked a colleague what part of town he was from. After explaining, he went on to say how much his wife loved the house and its location. That was of course until she died and soiled herself in their bed one night, which he didn't realise until the next morning. Sorry for asking. FML

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Today, I went to withdraw 200 dollars. At the ATM, I noticed a suspicious man standing really close to me. I was nervous about entering my pin number, and worried he was looking at my account information. In my panic, I got all the way home before realizing that I'd left the cash in the machine. FML

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Today, I logged onto Facebook to see one of my "friends" had used my account to post a coming-out story. It had comments on it such as "I knew it!" "Finally." and "That explains so much." FML

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Today, I was excited to see a spider skittering across my bathroom floor, because this one was real and not a hallucination. FML

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Today, I told my girlfriend of 2 years that I was sexually abused as a kid. She was only the third person I've told. She reacted by breaking up with me because I "might do something" to her kids. FML

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