Miscellaneous Help! - FML

Help!

spasticock - 19/08/2012 18:09 - Portugal - Barreiro

Today, I climbed the tree in my backyard so I could cut off some stray branches. I ended up getting stuck, and instead of immediately getting help, my wife started laughing and recording me. The video is now circulating on Facebook, and my new nickname is "Hawkeye." FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Anonymous - 10/07/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my husband finally got round to cutting down a tree limb in our front yard after months of me begging him. It fell on me. FML

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Gardening world

Anonymous - 17/05/2012 16:28 - United States - Great Mills

Today, I was trying to convince my husband to not trim the lower branches of my favorite tree. After pleading my case, I turned around and ran smack into one of said branches. My face and my dignity still hurt. FML

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Come down

Anonymous - 20/01/2015 20:24 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, I spent a half hour trying to help my cat down after he got stuck in the tree on my lawn. I finally gave up and called a local tree care company to help. When I returned outside, I found my cat casually walking about by the door. The guy who showed up to help was not happy. FML

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Did she say yes at least?

Anonymous - 10/02/2023 18:00

Today, I tried to propose to my partner in a creative way, but ended up getting stuck in a tree. FML

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Too little, too late

ragsy - 14/08/2009 16:54 - United States

Today, I finally went to Home Depot to buy a chainsaw to cut down the tree leaning dangerously over my garage. When I got home, I found the tree had fallen and taken out the roof while I was shopping. FML

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Move!

patrickRafael - 29/12/2009 14:21 - Singapore

Today, my father was pruning the tree in our front yard. I was helping him collect the falling branches. At one point, a branch fell and I was under it. My father jumped to push me out of the way. Instead he pushed the branch into my face. FML

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Stephanie - 14/07/2011 19:17 - United States

Today, my friends and I went to the park for some planking. Trying to find a daring spot, I climbed a tree and laid down on a branch. While I was waiting for my friends to take a picture, the branch gave out. FML

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PaperInfection - 23/11/2009 16:19 - United States

Today, I fell in a hole in my back yard and got stuck. My mother called the fire department. They all stood around laughing and taking pictures before they helped me. FML

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Did the rescue work?

Hero of the day - 19/12/2025 00:00

Today, I tried a heroic rescue: a toddler’s teddy stuck on a fifth-floor balcony. I borrowed a ladder, climbed while sweating, reached it, and felt my trousers rip with a sound like Velcro in a thunderstorm. Dangling there with my superhero boxers exposed, three people filmed me while jeering. FML

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shoutoutloud2him - 05/12/2009 08:48 - United States

Today, I was at Home Depot getting a Christmas tree with my family. While picking out a tree, a man thought it would be nice to help cut off the string that held the tree together. The branches hit me in the face and the guy managed to cut my hand. FML

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ebonyirony 29

Monday 20 August 2012 2:55

Put it on YouTube so we can see!

DocBastard 38

Monday 20 August 2012 2:59

How does that old saying go? Oh yeah - Learn to laugh at yourself, because everyone else is laughing at you already, jackass. I may be paraphrasing.

pandas_13 2

Monday 20 August 2012 18:50

The guy who plays hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) is really hot so I don't know what you're complaining about..

Ixi_the_pixie 11

Monday 20 August 2012 20:32

Hey hawkeye kicks ass, I mean its marvel!

ajeppsen 25

Monday 20 August 2012 20:52

I better see that on youtube I need a good laugh for the day.

mikeawesome 0

Monday 20 August 2012 22:01

That's an awesome nickname

benderbang48 4

Tuesday 21 August 2012 0:36

I knew a guy whos nickname was queef cause he was really good at eating girls out

reimichele 8

Tuesday 21 August 2012 6:51

Why Hawkeye? Why not Tarzan? Hawkeye is a BAMF though so wear the name proudly.

88vivera 9

Tuesday 21 August 2012 6:53

Ur wife is so mean

jm42345 5

Tuesday 21 August 2012 7:17

omg i got to see this you tube please

Jennielee 6

Tuesday 21 August 2012 16:00

I'm googling the video now!

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 22 August 2012 0:53

It's not that bad...better than getting stuck in the toilet...

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Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, in a fit of rage, my mom confessed to me that I was adopted, and if she had the chance to turn back time, she wouldn't have done it in the first place. All because I ate the last ice cream sandwich. FML

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Today, I might have ruined my co-worker's relationship with her fiancé, with whom I share a name, because we "work together too often" and now he doesn't know whose name she's saying during sex. FML

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Today, I went to a concert for the first time in 5 years. I got all dressed up and even ended up hanging out with the band. The night came to a screeching halt when I got a migraine and ended up in the ER vomiting non-stop. I was in the hospital all night. FML

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Today, I found out that the airhead sitting next to me at work who can't get anything done on her own, makes more money than I do. FML

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Today, my boyfriend and his parents met my family. My grandpa thought it would be funny to walk around with a realistic gun and make references about being in the mafia. The rest of my family went along with it. FML

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Today, after months of patiently trying to help my girlfriend deal with her anger issues, she dumped me in a blind rage for sneezing. FML

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