Intimacy Get it on

Get it on

SharkWeek - 27/10/2013 15:26 - United States - Wrightsville

Today, I reminded my husband that I was on my period, so he wouldn't try to fool around with me. A few hours later, his goldfish-like memory kicked in and he stuck his hand down my pants while we were going to bed. I was wearing a maxi pad. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

This is ain't it, son

I can never win - 13/07/2023 18:00

Today, and like every month, my husband goes through the wastebasket and checks my used pads for proof that I’m not lying about being on my period to get out of sex, all because once, I didn’t feel like having sex and said I was on my period, even though I wasn’t. He found out I lied because he saw my clean pad. FML

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Anonymous - 22/09/2018 13:30

Today, I apparently had diarrhea in my sleep. I had to get up and sneak to the bathroom so as to not wake my husband. When he asked about the stain, I panicked and told him I started my period. FML

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Anonymous - 09/11/2011 01:20 - United States

Today, my boyfriend drove me home. I mentioned how I had recently started my period and he freaked out, saying I would "leak" through my tampon onto his seat. He made me sit on towels all the way home. FML

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Turn me on

kk. - 24/02/2022 16:00

Today, I'm on my period and super bloated. My husband laid down next to me and said, "Hey pretty lady, wanna have a good time? Let me stick my pin in and let some of that air out", then made a deflating noise with a hand movement. FML

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cek4uytp - 25/06/2011 06:02 - United States

Today, my boyfriend caught me in a lie about being on my period. He memorized my menstrual cycle, but still forgot that today is my birthday. FML

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Anonymous - 28/12/2017 06:00

Today, I went home with a guy I met at the bar. I warned him that I was on my period, but he said it was fine. Not only was the sex awful, I woke up to find that he'd smeared period blood on my face in the dark. FML

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My body hates me

How? - 09/10/2022 22:30

Today, I'm on the last few days of my period. After nothing came out the whole day, a dollop of blood suddenly poured out, somehow managed to entirely circumvent the giant pad I was wearing, and went straight into my underwear, pants, and the chair I was sitting on. FML

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onething - 08/07/2009 17:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend picked me up to come spend the night at his house, and on the way he started pulling over to get some condoms. I told him no need, I was on my period. He turned the car around and took me home. FML

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Anonymous - 06/12/2013 21:37 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

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RedWaters - 06/03/2013 20:20 - United States

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

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happle 21

Sunday 27 October 2013 19:19

That's pretty nasty, but it seems like he would have learned his lesson.

Misshhh 23

Sunday 27 October 2013 19:21

Looks like he was caught.. Red handed... YEEEAAAAA xD

johnpaisley 6

Sunday 27 October 2013 22:52

Thats not nice making fun of me and all guys um I forgot...

worldclassrager 39

Sunday 27 October 2013 23:16

He would probably need another reminder...or for that matter just try the I am not in the mood phrase...

birds_fml 7

Sunday 27 October 2013 23:34

HAHAHA one time my husband decided to pants me (he was aware I was on my period) while I was wearing a pad. Of course it was soaked and bloody at the time. He hasn't pants me since!

skyeyez9 24

Sunday 27 October 2013 23:40

I laughed when I read "goldfish like memory."

juarezj96 12

Sunday 27 October 2013 23:45

Ewww >:b

SuzyTurquoiseBlu 25

Sunday 27 October 2013 23:55

He totally deserved that. Lol!

sxm 13

Monday 28 October 2013 0:23

Sex while on your period is actually good. Me and my ex did it a lot of time when she was on her period, a little messy but it was all good.

lil_mars 1

Monday 28 October 2013 0:56

I understand it can sound uncomfortable... But honestly, sex while on your period is really nice. It will help you from feeling shitty and unsexy. It could also cease the cramps and nausea, or at least distract you from them.