Kids Genius

Genius

joshua - 25/01/2010 21:24 - United States

Today, I got a call from my younger brother's school to pick him up immediately. He had a test today, but he had the brilliant idea that by telling everyone he had head lice, he could go home. I had to leave work to pick him up, and now I have to take him to a doctor so they can see if he can go back. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

imalilangel05 - 10/02/2009 15:08 - United States

Today, I was tutoring kids at an elementary school. One kid messed up my hair. I said, "Why'd you do that??" He said, "I have lice, now you have lice too!" FML

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MrsRODixon - 05/03/2015 12:38 - United Kingdom - Pencoed

Today, I received an urgent call from my son's nursery asking me to collect him, saying he was, "lethargic, complaining about being ill and crying". I get there and he's running around, playing and admits he just wanted to come home. They still made me take him home. FML

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Wage slave

Janet - - United States

Today, my boss called me into his office. I thought I was getting promoted because my sales had been really high lately. My boss shut his door behind me and asked me if I could comb his hair with a lice comb to get rid of his lice. I had to do it to keep my job. FML

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Shame! Shaaaame!

poormomma - 15/04/2020 08:00

Today, I found out my son kept quiet about having head lice for a week. He's 14. FML

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Little shit

Anonymous - - United States

Today, I went to pick up my little brother from his friend's house. When I got there, he ran off screaming that he didn't know me. His friend's parents believed him. FML

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frustrated - 11/07/2013 04:52 - United States - Antioch

Today, I got head lice, so I went to a store to buy medicated shampoo. When checking out the cashier saw my shampoo and asked me to leave immediately to protect the other customers. He didn't let me buy the shampoo. FML

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Cheeky

RB84 - 22/04/2017 02:00

Today I got a call from my daughter's school, because she claimed that she couldn't see out of her right eye. I panicked and went to pick her up. On the way to the emergency room, she turns to me and says, "I'm fine. I didn't want to take a test." FML

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benjavel71 - 10/01/2017 11:13 - United States - Prairie Grove

Today, I thought about going to visit an old girlfriend of mine with hopes of getting a little head. Unfortunately, I didn't know it would be head lice I'd get. FML

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goddamn chicken subs - 24/03/2016 16:51 - United States

Today, my brother and I got food poisoning because of the shady chicken subs we ate last night. Our mom thinks we're faking it and sent us to school anyway. I'm coming to you live from a school toilet while missing a test. FML

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Picky - 06/07/2017 14:58

Today, I woke up to my younger brother picking his nose with my fingers. His explanation? "You were sleeping." FML

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BadPinkKitty07 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:35

lice, lice, baby!

youdidwhatnow 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:37

Haha, I love your brother.

BadPinkKitty07 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:35

lice, lice, baby!

h_langston12 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:38

lmfao@^ but OP, that sucks.

tisiphone_fml 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 2:11

I know... I wouldn't have seen the light of day for weeks!

tomc666 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:48

I replied to bomber no 1

nothingbutnet003 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:49

you sir, have earned a steaming hot pile of win. and to the OP, i'd say karma took care of your bro for you :D

youdidwhatnow 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:37

Haha, I love your brother.

Sun_Kissed18 25

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:54

Conniving little one, no? I would have never thought of that. I could have used it today! Damn, oh well

baseball6917 8

Wednesday 25 May 2011 5:06

her little brother is definitely winning. lol

Luckster 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:38

I would have had one hell of a punishment if I ever pulled that stunt off! I really hope your brother gets in trouble for this, OP.

iankennedy17 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:39

this sounds more like a retarded facebook status. leave the bullshit of fml, we don't give a shit.....

itsucks12 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:39

should have raised him better.

050294 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:48

It was his brother, dumbass.

MadeOfAwesome 1

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:42

This doesn't sound like an FML, more like an entertaining anecdote. And that WAS a brilliant idea, actually.

Pointy130 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 4:31

Yeah. That kid will go places.

chaos753159 4

Tuesday 26 January 2010 4:32

like jail or the white house?

alexandraa_fml 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 6:23

Whats the difference?

riku3220 2

Tuesday 26 January 2010 6:26

Good idea until he realizes that he'll have to stay after school one day or stay in during recess to take the test!!!

mshafty 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:45

Wow your bother is clever. I think he has a nice career ahead of him as a con man.

youdidwhatnow 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 2:13

Or a congressman.

krnmafia92 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 3:20

What's the difference?

toxic10uhc 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 5:51

zing.

robb23 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 7:32

lmfao @ the cogressmen, and the zing

meenz 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:48

LMFAO!!

what_the_fail 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:50

Your brothers awesome! His idea was smart

Tikwichka 5

Tuesday 26 January 2010 1:57

It is a win for all; the boy gets off school and out of his test and the OP gets to leave work early!

Luckster 0

Tuesday 26 January 2010 2:03

In this economy, unless someone is dying and you need to be there, it is never a good thing to leave work early.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my 10-year-old son's friend googled his name and found breastfeeding pictures that I had put on a personal website when he was 2 days old. Now he gets laughed at, and his friends all saw pictures of my breasts. FML

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Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML

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Today, was very chilly. My little sister felt sorry for my two goldfish swimming in the cold water. She decided to put them in hot water. They died. FML

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Today, I had a seizure at my boyfriend's. The second I began to seize, he cursed and picked me up, dropping me on the floor complaining, "Now I have to clean the damn couch." I had urinated because I had no control over my body. The couch is still stained. He dumped me for ruining his furniture. FML

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Today, I was walking my dog. Suddenly, my insane neighbor who loves dogs a bit too much comes over and asks to pet my dog. I say OK, thinking that if I watch her, she won't do anything. I turn around to make sure no cars are coming and when I turn back, she's trying to steal my dog. FML

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Today, I went to a fast food restaurant. The guy behind me was a pretty hot latin guy. When I went to pay, my purse fell off the counter. My birth control pills, a condom, 3 super plus tampons and an extra pair of underwear I keep in there for emergencies fell out at his feet. FML

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