Sex, Frustration Intimacy Gagging for it

Gagging for it

Anonymous - 26/06/2011 21:42 - United States

Today, I went on a third date with a guy, hoping I'd finally get some action. I got a high five. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Sl3vin - 19/01/2010 14:17 - United States

Today, I went on a third date with a guy, hoping that maybe finally I would get some physical interaction. I did. I got a high five. FML

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BadGuyLuck - 25/02/2012 06:33 - United States

Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML

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bootycall:( - 15/02/2017 13:00 - United States - Oxnard

Today, I went on what I thought was my fifth date with a guy. We finally got intimate and it was amazing. As soon as it was over, he said : "Sorry babe, I should get going. I have a date tomorrow and I'd hate to be tired for it." FML

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Ummm - 03/08/2016 19:45 - United States - Wheaton

Today, I was on a second date with a guy. Things got a little handsy and he pulled down his pants to reveal a micro-penis. He then smiled and asked me to be his girlfriend. FML

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Unlucky - 25/07/2012 13:03 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML

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stupiddddddd - 08/07/2009 07:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I got further with a guy than I've ever before. By that, I mean I got his phone number. FML

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Hanging

James - 31/07/2011 04:20 - United States

Today, I was at a local restaurant. The girl that I like walked by so I tried to give her a high five. My hand ended up on her boob instead. FML

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Hard no

unemployable - - United States

Today, I had an important job interview. The interviewer really seemed to like me. Instead of hiring me, he asked me out on a date. FML

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Anonymous - 26/01/2013 17:20 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML

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Let down

heartbreakkid21 - 14/05/2009 15:22 - United States

Today, I was on a date with this girl I actually like. The date was going really well and it seemed like it would be a good night. While in the movie theater, I went to hold her hand and instead she gave me a hand shake and said, "You're so funny, I'm so glad we're friends". FML

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flockz 19

Monday 27 June 2011 0:50

a high five where her hand was the ****** and his hand was his dick.

fthku 13

Monday 27 June 2011 1:50

$50 per session is my type of girl.

greekamericanpri 2

Monday 27 June 2011 1:05

the best birth control ever! lol

mismonroe 0

Monday 27 June 2011 1:06

I'd rather see his pen..is.

Babalu722 3

Monday 27 June 2011 1:06

Thats a ZINGA!

ThorneCrossed 9

Monday 27 June 2011 1:07

ask him for a 'high five' with a reach around and cuddling afterward

Consequences 0

Monday 27 June 2011 1:08

So initiate it. Quit being a cat.

meggs2209 0

Monday 27 June 2011 1:09

that's some hot action! look out! that fourth date JUST MIGHT be a knuckle touch... a girl can only dream, huh?

JLY_fml 0

Monday 27 June 2011 1:09

either he is gay or ur just ugly

Quest_ 13

Monday 27 June 2011 1:11

Double post

danz123 7

Monday 27 June 2011 1:16

Ugh, girls have only one thing on their mind don't they? *Whimpers* Don't you care about his emoti- OK I'll stop now.

j_cat187 19

Monday 27 June 2011 1:19

let him know you are horney by plowing him in the restarunt

vihan 0

Monday 27 June 2011 1:41

what's that

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I found out I'm starting to get varicose veins, typical in older people who don't move enough. I'm 34 and I get 9 hours of exercise a week. FML

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Today, sewage came up the toilet and tub in my apartment and spread far enough to get into the hallway. The maintenance crew found the source of the blocked pipes to be a ten inch long weave some idiot flushed down a toilet. FML

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Today, a traffic plod with nothing better to do gave me a ticket for my back bumper being a few inches over the start of some double yellow lines. He took photos, with a ruler and everything. FML

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Today, my dad threw a waffle at my face for his own amusement. FML

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Today, I was using my flashlight app in the driveway to avoid stepping in puddles, as my new shoes are untreated suede. I dropped my phone in the puddle instead. FML

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Tsk tsk tsk...

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