Intimacy, Sex Cheating Dude…

Dude…

Anonymous - 27/01/2017 18:00

Today, I told my girlfriend that I miss the amazing sex life we used to have, as we haven't had sex in months. She accidentally blurted out, "Well, I've still got one." It seems our neighbour has taken over my role in the bedroom. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Turntables

Bill Mantie - 18/04/2021 02:00

Today, after months of successfully taking strides to boost my long diminished libido, I found out my girlfriend, who always had a healthy sex drive, has now lost hers. Oh, how the tables have turned. FML

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Very sexy and highly romantic

Anonymous - 11/06/2024 14:00 - United States - Lynbrook

Today, my girlfriend said she’s been wanting to have sex lately. We haven’t done it in so long, I've lost track. We still haven’t done it. Part of me wants to fuck someone else. FML

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saddened97 - 20/01/2011 09:39 - Australia

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was fingering me. After he left, my mum says to me "I wish my sex life was as interesting as yours." She had walked in and we hadn't even noticed. FML

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rawdoglyfe69 - 17/04/2013 06:14 - United States - Helena

Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML

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Anonymous - 19/08/2010 06:32 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend of a year exclaimed "Oh my god!" for the first time during sex. Nope, I haven't improved in bed, I recently moved a TV into my room and something exciting happened on the show she was watching. FML

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Stuck in a rut

Anonymous - 16/04/2020 20:00

Today, I realised my wife has been slowly phasing out most elements of our previously active and inventive sex life. These days, it's missionary once a month or she tells me to whack one off by myself in the bathroom. When did we get so boring? FML

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unsatisfied - 29/11/2010 12:13 - Australia

Today, I was lying in bed listening to my neighbors have loud, and what sounded like, enjoyable sex. My boyfriend rolled over and said, "she sounds like fun" before rolling back over and going to sleep. It's been four months. FML

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Honest

fml1977 - 04/03/2010 06:43 - United States

Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML

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peacexout108 - 08/11/2009 18:16 - United States

Today, my ex told me she still misses having sex with me. Her next text was "but it's still over." FML

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Snoozefest

notsogood - 08/11/2013 20:02 - United States

Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML

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stopthepuck 0

Friday 27 January 2017 18:03

She took love thy neighbor a little too seriously

tosdyke 16

Friday 27 January 2017 18:28

...time for a new girlfriend

WillMM76 12

Monday 30 January 2017 4:05

Kick her ass out! Asap!

niashields 0

Wednesday 1 February 2017 5:05

Ex* girlfriend I hope??

wickedgetz 30

Friday 28 April 2017 20:22

wow, me thinks she loves thy neighbor a bit too much

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Jealousy Underwear Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I tore my calf muscle while skipping and singing Yellow Brick Road. I'm off my foot for 4-6 weeks and don't even have a cool story. FML

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Today, my mom’s house and mine share the same garden. After I complained about an ugly compost bin she had outside my bedroom window, she finally took it away and put it… smack dab in front of my terrace. FML

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Today, my boyfriend told me he's prepared to commit to marriage, but only if I buy my own ring and tell everyone he surprised me with it. FML

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Today, I was fired because I spoke up about a supervisor mistreating me. The assistant VP spent the meeting demeaning me to “teach me a lesson” and then said she was firing me because I “stirred the pot." Man, I really loved that job but I won’t miss the toxic work culture. FML

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Today, I woke up to my boyfriend pulling off scabs and eating them. My scabs. FML

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Today, I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were three girls loudly discussing blowjob techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was, "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML

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