Dramatic Entrance Fail - FML

Dramatic Entrance Fail

FML Approved - 01/08/2017 03:28

It's not easy being cheesy...

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

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Sunday 20 August 2017 0:13

Thank god the garage door was in the way, mom might have been just another statistic from being run over.

gobiteme2 34

Sunday 20 August 2017 0:13

Thank god the garage door was in the way, mom might have been just another statistic from being run over.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I took a piss while doing yard work. Later, to my horror, I discovered that I had touched poison oak at some point. My penis is now blistered and swollen. FML

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Today, I was feeling really down, so I texted my boyfriend, hoping to get some emotional support. He texted me back twenty minutes later, asking for nude pictures. FML

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Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

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Today, and thanks to my psychologist, I realized I have yet again wasted years on a one-sided friendship, after said friend cut me out of his life without even speaking to me. The reason? I told him to talk to the people he had issues with before cutting them out of his life. FML

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Today, I found out my boyfriend keeps a gun under his pillow. This was only after my friends and I surprised him with his birthday cake while he was sleeping. FML

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Today, I'm so deprived of intimacy that I got a raging boner when a waitress called me "hun". FML

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