Wanker Intimacy Creepy

Creepy

Thank God I Flush Them Down The Toilet - 26/09/2015 01:10 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I walked into my room and watched as my fanatically religious mother sniffed the used tissues in my trash bin to make sure I wasn't masturbating. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Got the sniffles

Jizzyface - 29/12/2013 12:36 - United Kingdom - Wilmslow

Today, my strict Christian mother walked into my room just after I'd finished masturbating. Although dressed, I was still holding the used tissue, which she noticed. Having to think fast to disguise my deed and avoid an entire sermon, I had no option but to blow my nose with the spunky tissue. FML

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Anonymous - 14/09/2012 05:28 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I walked in on my mother rubbing one out. For the third time. I then had to explain to her, also for the third time, why pleasuring herself in the living room is inappropriate. FML

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Isabell - 06/02/2010 05:31 - Australia

Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML

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laughingflame - 04/08/2011 06:00 - United States

Today, I was caught whacking off by my mother. She now takes every free moment of her time to read extracts from the Bible to me. FML

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Lock your doors

Anonymous - 27/05/2019 00:14

Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML

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Anonymous - 07/05/2016 01:40 - United States - Walnut

Today, I walked in on my mom in the bathroom, washing a dildo. FML

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No fun allowed

but cum to think of it... - 03/07/2015 21:29

Today, my extremely religious mom ranted at me, saying I'd only bought an electric toothbrush so I could masturbate with it. I'm a guy. FML

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Classy

bkay26 - 29/08/2010 15:37 - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom giving my dad head. Acting like I hadn't seen anything, I asked if I could use a towel sitting on the dresser. My mom said, "No, we're going to need that one." FML

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Caught red-handed

caught - 09/01/2012 00:43 - United States

Today, I was bored and started touching myself watching TV. My mother walked into my bedroom with a phone in her hand and yelled, "Stop jacking off and talk to your grandmother." FML

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WTF roomie?

JN5SLK - 08/11/2013 22:29 - United States - Salt Lake City

Today, I walked into my dorm room, only to witness my roommate shaving her vag over my trashcan. FML

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spinda 22

Saturday 26 September 2015 19:55

WTF. That's ******* gross and creepy.

sturschaedel 27

Saturday 26 September 2015 19:53

She just doesn't want you to go blind.

cadyshaw17 13

Sunday 27 September 2015 1:15

You really shouldn't flush tissues down the toilet. It's bad for the pipes

DoomedGemini 37

Sunday 27 September 2015 13:01

And if he throws them in the trash, it's bad for op.

LeeEverett 20

Sunday 27 September 2015 1:17

California gets all the weirdos. Just read the FML above this one

Robert3Lee 13

Sunday 27 September 2015 1:30

Nice name tag ???

sunny354wi 8

Sunday 27 September 2015 2:37

Buy her a UV light for crying out loud!!

captainsmegma 12

Sunday 27 September 2015 3:01

She can smell the difference between cum and not. What church teaches that?

butterbunny 15

Sunday 27 September 2015 3:06

My brain can't even process the amount of stupidity in this fml. Sorry op

orios105 18

Sunday 27 September 2015 3:26

crispy socks ~key and peele

KneeJerker 24

Sunday 27 September 2015 3:41

If your name is true, that is genius. Thanks for the tip! *flushes next ones down the toilet*

ezrajab 22

Sunday 27 September 2015 5:42

Nasty

itsme82 18

Sunday 27 September 2015 6:12

Take care of things in the shower. Op, I'm sorry you're being brought up in this kind of home. You're a normal, healthy kid and I hope you don't let your mom stop you from doing you.