Cleanliness is next to someone else

Anonymous - 10/03/2020 15:00

Today, we got new seats in my English class; I was seated next to a boy that I don't know very well. When I sat down, he informed me that he is "opposed" to brushing his teeth. I thought he was kidding. Then he started breathing with his mouth open. These are our seats for the rest of the year. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Oh dear, oh no

Anonymous - 31/10/2012 00:29 - United States - Wooster

Today, we got new seats in class today. The guy placed next to me, turned, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "The balls are the warmest place on the body" while his hands were in his pants. I'm stuck next to him for the rest of the semester. FML

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FOCUS!

Anonymous -

Today, we got a new seating arrangement in my science class. I'm now sitting between two people who have spent the last 20 minutes whispering dirty things to one another. FML

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even axe would smell better - 04/02/2014 18:55 - United Kingdom - Aylesbury

Today, a kid in class kept chatting to his friend, and was made to swap seats. Every time the guy he swapped with moved, the stench from his armpits wafted over. It smelled like nacho cheese crossed with ball sweat. It got so bad that I eventually had to go dry heave in the toilets. FML

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Professor Awkward

Derpina - 21/12/2011 15:33 - United States

Today, a student came in late to class, and there were only a couple of seats available. I waved her over offering her the seat beside me with the quip, "It's OK, you can sit by me. I don't smell or anything." I realized after she sat down that she actually did. FML

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Creepy

Anonymous - - United States

Today, in my psychology class, the creepy guy who sits beside me every day leans over and says, "I have an upset stomach, I may have to use the bathroom." FML

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loner - 12/02/2011 00:08 - United States

Today, in an effort to make new friends in my history class, I sat in the empty seat next to a friendly-looking guy. He got up, walked away, and sat down in a different seat. FML

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Anonymous - 03/12/2012 17:47 - United States - Richland

Today, I found out what the two girls I sit near to fight about every day: seating. The loser has to sit next to me. FML

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Annoying

taternuts - 26/11/2011 12:18 - Canada

Today, one of my classmates pointed out that our professor has a habit of sucking his teeth at the end of each sentence. I'd never noticed before. I can't concentrate anymore, all I can focus on is his weird teeth noise thing. FML

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WTTFFFF - 09/05/2014 17:24 - United States - Tecumseh

Today, the creepy kid who sits behind me in English class decided that sniffing my hair wasn't disturbing enough for his liking, so he tried something new: popping one of the pimples on my neck. When I reacted in horror, all he could say was, "It looked pretty..." FML

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pzy - 24/10/2016 15:46

Today, I'm in the middle seat on a flight to Dallas. The guy on the aisle is sleeping with his mouth open and I can smell his breath. I feel nauseous. FML

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Marcella1016 31

Tuesday 10 March 2020 21:56

Kid is a ******* inconsiderate dick. Not to be petty, but start chewing and popping gum really loudly or something and tell him you’re “opposed” to chewing with your mouth closed. Or you could go the non-passive aggressive route and tell him directly that it disturbs your environment (and everyone else around him). It’s probably on purpose, though - he wants to keep people away. Your best bet is to explain the situation to the teacher and ask to change seats. Hopefully your teacher isn’t a dick too though. Some of those jerks just go mad with power and say no to all student requests just because they can... TL;DR: FYL, OP