Love Bat out of hell - FML

Bat out of hell

goodeyesight - 11/10/2012 14:02 - Brazil - Sào Paulo

Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Oh no…

Anonymous - 08/03/2023 20:00 - United States - Houston

Today, I went on a blind date. Not only I had already been on a date with the guy before, we'd also had both forgotten about it until halfway through the dinner. FML

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Bad omen

coveholli - 15/11/2014 14:43 - Australia - Perth

Today, I went on a blind date. Not only did his phone go flat before I found him, but we were at totally different bars. FML

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Anonymous - 05/11/2012 19:21 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML

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Tiffosaur - 04/01/2013 06:12 - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML

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Tonight, on Blind Dates…

dateless - - United Kingdom - London

Today, I went on a blind date. He took one look at me and said, "Well, we might as well get a drink anyway." FML

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Joe Smooth

Anonymous - 09/01/2022 04:59 - United States - West Covina

Today, I went on a blind date. My date spent the whole time at the restaurant on his phone and didn't even try to show interest. Thankfully I'll never have to deal with this individual ever again. FML

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Classic

KDH - 26/01/2024 09:00 - United States - Santa Monica

Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML

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LoveSucks - 18/05/2019 21:54

Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was 'really his own best friend'. FML

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SoccerBabe42 - 26/12/2011 12:11 - Canada

Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was "really his own best friend." FML

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Anonymous - 26/11/2009 17:44 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a blind double date with my friend. My date was actually blind. Not so bad, he seemed nice, until he told me I sound ugly and annoying. My friend laughed and agreed. FML

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betseyville 6

Thursday 11 October 2012 18:52

I bet they weren't as ugly as your attitude.

DocBastard 38

Thursday 11 October 2012 18:54

How many hot 70-year olds have you ever seen? None, right? Yet, these people continue to be married because smart people understand that looks fade with time. After you become wrinkly, what's left over is your personality. And YOUR personality, sir, is downright hideous.

Cinderella_Man 10

Friday 12 October 2012 3:08

Foda se! ;op

Fuzzymonkey2013 7

Friday 12 October 2012 4:27

I wish this was on Facebook so I could like it

Psychology_13 8

Friday 12 October 2012 5:16

beggers can't be choosers

ziggystar69 3

Friday 12 October 2012 5:21

Most parents teach the kids there kids Sbout incest but you clearly have failed. Family values boom out the windows

HoesKnowMe 2

Friday 12 October 2012 5:22

You're a dick. Give people a chance

jules3198604 4

Friday 12 October 2012 6:04

Boy people are awfully shallow these days!! I'm sure you aren't perfect either.

sou_fml 3

Friday 12 October 2012 6:12

Shallow mofo

happylawyer 16

Friday 12 October 2012 7:10

My mother used to say than when I like a man instead of him feeling honored he must feel insulted because I liked the ugliest men around. The way a person smiles and look at you tells a lot about his/her personality. That's what I need to like.

sistersmother 3

Friday 12 October 2012 7:27

this is straight messed up ha ha

lambda_fml 40

Friday 12 October 2012 12:05

I hope your date was blind enough.

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my roommate wants me to leave for a bit so she can “have a ton of fun.” Is it horrible that I wish it was me, because I can’t remember how long it’s been since I had any “fun"? FML

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Today, I was about to make a left turn. In the turn lane a little old lady was waiting for the light to change. On the back of her car was a bumper sticker that said, "Honk if you love Jesus!" I gave her a honk and waved. She leaned out and yelled, "The light's red, asshole." FML

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Today, I awoke to an excruciating pain in my back from sleeping in the same position all night. I can't wipe my own ass. I've already gone to shit twice. FML

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Today, sleeping in a little late, I was woken up by my phone. Still tired, I quickly checked the display to realize it was my girlfriend calling. I pick up the phone saying, "Hey baby girl!" She seemed pretty startled, so I double-checked and realized it was my new boss, who has the name as my girlfriend. FML

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Today, I picked up my 3 friends from a party. One of them drank too much and claimed she needed to throw up. I pulled over multiple times so she could. It didn't happen until we were right in front of her house and still inside my car. FML

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Today, while having some "personal" time, I felt intense pleasure and moaned. I learned that my own moaning prevents me from reaching my peak. I'm my own turn off. FML

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